The Librarian: Quest for the Spear (2004)

The Librarian: Quest for the Spear (2004) is basically A Night at the Museum (2006) and National Treasure (2004) meet Indiana Jones 1 (1981) and 3 (1989). The Librarian is a tongue-in-cheek, clever, camp-ridden romp with made-for-TV action, special effects, and editing. No amped-up action and theme song as in Mission Impossible 1, 2, and 3, though I'd more readily watch The Librarian a third time. I first caught it on TNT -- a must-see since the title promised (not "a" but) "the" Librarian and a quest. For what...? The spear that pierced Christ's side, has been hidden for two millennia, and gives power over life and death to its wielder (which should *not* be the bad guy, who by the way will stop at nothing to get it). Noah Wyle does a fine job as the scrappy, cute, brainy geek who gets hired as the current caretaker of the world's most important library. Bob Newhart does his usual schtick with grand aplomb as Librarian Emeritus and Noah's guiding mentor. (Don't miss Bob's whoopass fight scenes at the end.) Jane Curtin is also a stitch as Bob's starchy second-in-command. The star of the show, however, is Sonya Walger as Noah's Lara Croft-style bodyguard. She's hot (in a made-for-TV sort of way)! (Don't miss her girl-on-girl kickboxing action with Kelly Hu.) Adults who have lost touch with their inner child will gripe about the production values of this movie and it's true: The plot, editing, and special effects are so slapdash sometimes that this is arguably more of a family film than action-adventure or fantasy. On the plus side, it doesn't take itself too seriously so you don't have to either. It is full of little surprises esp. droll tongue-in-cheek touches and dialog. (Sonya: "I am far out of your league. In fact, if your league were to explode, I wouldn't hear it for three days.") Noah continues to hope for a way to win her heart, kidding about jungle sleeping arrangements and being put off, since Sonya is after all a professional (who was nominated for a Saturn award for this role). Near the end they find a rapprochement and, while nothing is shown but a disheveled bedroom, that may be too much for some families and little innocents. On the other hand, Olympia Dukakis is Noah's doting mother who is pleased that a woman has finally answered her son's phone. I leave you now with three words: Droll. Tongue-in-cheek. Funny! 4.5 stars.