Noisy Nora (2007)

One of my favorite children's TV shows when my oldest sons were tykes was Reading Rainbow. Like many of Scholastic's mildly animated storybook titles, Noisy Nora (...and More Stories About Mischief) comes close to the look and feel of that show with capable narrators (sometimes the authors themselves) and slow-motion animation of portions of the illustrated page. Noisy Nora by Rosemary Wells (6 min, narrated by Mary Beth Hurt, 4 stars) is the charming lead story of this collection; very much in the vein of Wells' Ruby and Max series, Nora is the middle child who has to make a clatter to get any attention in her family -- cute! T Is For Terrible by Peter McCarty (6 min, narrated by David de Vries, 4.5 stars) is the tale of a T-rex who "can't help it" that he's so big and terrifying -- excellent! Cannonball is a live-action movie (28 min, based on the book Cannonball Simp by John Burningham, 3 stars) about a circus clown who's to be fired until a stray dog joins his act -- family friendly! Goggles! by Ezra Jack Keats (3.5 stars) deals with two inner-city young boys who need to find safe passage around the projects -- interesting! And last but not least, the bonus story Munro by Jules Feiffer (9 min, narrated by Howard Morris, 5 stars) is a marvelous military satire (and Academy Award winner in 1961) about a 4-year-old boy who gets drafted into the army -- classic! Overall 4 stars.

A Life Less Ordinary (1997)

I absolutely love A Life Less Ordinary! It's quirky and original and always a pleasure to watch. Our story begins as the self-centered daughter (Cameron Diaz) of a cold-hearted corporate mogul (Ian Holm) throws a snit in daddy's office just as a disgruntled janitor (Ewan McGregor) bursts in protest his employer's indignities. Words and actions escalate until the daughter engineers her own abduction -- all to get back at daddy (who refuses to give a whit). Ewan does very well at playing such a sincere, um, putz that Cameron realizes she has to teach him how to phone in a ransom demand much less act like an alpha male. Better still, two angels in human form (Holly Hunter and Delroy Lindo, who could pass for Morgan Freeman) have been banished from heaven until they can cause this hapless road-tripping couple to fall in love. Delroy is the steady head but Holly has an attitude -- plus, as the stress gets to her, she starts to become unhinged. My favorite scene is when she breaks out a sniper rifle, determined to do whatever it takes to finish the job and get back to heaven -- as if! Ewan and Cameron evince an easy chemistry -- flashing in anger but eventually warming in affection. This is just a sweet, loopy love story that's extremely fun to watch -- so much so that I had to own it. 5 stars.

RV (2006)

RV wasn't as bad as I expected (given what I'd inferred from the trailers and the buzz). In fact, it was OK. Sure, it has a few tired cliches (sight gags, potty humor, and adversity-pulls-embattled-family-together scenes) but these are nearly balanced by the charming quirkiness of the trailer park family that cannot be escaped (for good or for ill). Our story begins as Robin Williams' abusive beverage-magnate boss forces him to cancel his family's greatly anticipated trip to Hawaii in order to make an iffy pitch to a prospective buyout in Colorado. Hawaii was to be his family's last hurrah before the daughter enrolls at Stanford and his dotty (even doting) wife has even promised him some one-on-one time together ("good naps"). Determined to keep his job but not disappoint (much less tell) his family, he talks them into taking an RV road trip to Colorado (so he can try to write his proposal in the wee hours and send it to his boss). I can definitely empathize with his struggles to find privacy, power, a perch for his laptop, a phone line, and a cellular signal in the hinterlands. His challenges are legion but the absolute worst is the toilet system blowout. (At least Patrick Warburton wasn't in this movie to say "Eww! Your mouth was open!" -- though I think it was.) Nevertheless, just like when movie couples who antagonize each other magically fall in love when a romantic song rises to the fore, this family's tensions inexplicably give way to affection and warmth as we approach the feel-good ending. Because it's ultimately about family and family values, most families will enjoy this family movie. 3 stars.

Welcome to Mars: Nova (2005)

Nova's Mars: Dead or Alive -- the story of the design, construction, and space flight of the twin Mars rovers -- is the prequel to Nova's Welcome to Mars -- the story of the rovers' explorations of the Martian surface. Welcome to Mars is a pretty straightforward telling of the rovers' on-planet challenges, frustrations, and amazing successes -- from the perspective of a bunch of rocket scientists (whose favorite comfort food when under career-crunching emotional stress seems to be ice cream novelties). You get to see space-science doctorates stressing out, whooping it up, and giving bear hugs. (It's NASA's way of letting us know rocket scientists are people too and also of impressing on us landlubbers the incredible consequences for humanity's future that is potentially at stake with the Mars mission.) Whether the Mars rovers' operational hiccups, terrain obstacles, or ultimate demise constitute a technological who-done-it or thriller fare for you, anyone with a mind for science and its implications should follow Spirit's and Opportunity's progressive analysis and discovery of the prior existence of water -- and hence possibly life -- on the surface of Mars (some several billion years ago). Simply superb photos and closeups of the surface of Mars! 4 stars.

Imagine That (2009)

If my reaction is any indication, Imagine That may be offensive to those with concerns for racial stereotypes and child abuse. (At various times and to my 11-year-old viewing companion, I was growling or murmuring "This is so wrong...") However, everything tidily works out in the last five minutes in a sugar-coated happy ending -- so that makes it all OK ... doesn't it? Eddie Murphy in Imagine That is Michael Douglas in Wall Street meets Adam Sandler in Bedtime Stories. (Are you worried yet?) Stock trading is a high-octane, dog-eat-dog world; Murphy is high-octane and can buff it up with the best -- but can the man who once played Dr. Doolittle put the bicuspids to a canine (even metaphorically)? He's just too nice -- OK, smarmy. He's also daddy to a wonderful little girl. (OK, now get ready to be afraid.) Yara Shahidi is the true star of Imagine That; she is pitch-perfect in every scene. However, the script has this 6-year-old dependent on her bedroom blanket (her "goo-gah"), screaming shrilly when separated from it, and speaking to four imaginary friends and a dragon -- who of course give her stock investment tips! (OK, now be very afraid.) Thomas Haden Church plays a Native American stockbroker who's gone native; his unorthodox boardroom style is all chants and drumming and vision-quest gibberish that wins over clients by sheer momentum of his alpha-male posturing (or, as he puts it, "It's just a thing"). (OK, now be extremely afraid.) Murphy goes over the top to regain his boardroom equilibrium by performing outright minstrelsy -- bug-eyed shuck-and-jive. I suppose if anyone can do it today, Murphy can -- but it is appalling esp. since there is no point. (OK, now experience shock and awe.) In the feeding frenzy of a do-or-die competition to not just keep their jobs but to inherit control of the investment firm, each man perpetrates indignities upon their children that border on child abuse: Church cranks his kid up on Red Bull while Murphy breaks into a house, creeps into a room full of sleeping little girls, and steals their blankets (before inducing a confrontational scene that's traumatic for all and wildly screaming "I want my goo-gah!"). You wouldn't think there's any excuse for such pap and circumstance but the script half-redeems itself by means of any scene with a mature adult named Martin Sheen in it, followed by a sugar-sweet family-time finale. By compromise, just barely 3 stars.

The Garden (2008)

The Garden is a documentary about the hopes and losses of the simple urban poor as they face the capriciousness of the rich and politically devious. Conceived as a peaceful initiative following the Rodney King race riots, a Los Angeles nonprofit operated the largest community garden in the country for 12 years, giving plots of land to 372 mostly Latino families to grow their own fresh fruit and vegetables. Comments from a variety of these salt-of-the-earth types belies how much their subsistence and welfare depended on the small plots of land they nurtured to a healthy harvest. Suddenly and inexplicably, their grassroots nirvana is to be taken away. They organize themselves, seek an injunction, and begin to learn how to dig up a different kind of dirt and wage a community-based appeal. The challenge is daunting yet their efforts are ultimately successful. This is a detective story with riveting twists and turns, indications of secret collusion, and evidence of confounding duplicity between two passive-aggressive county officials and the former owner. I don't want to give away the ending but if you care for the protagonists in this story (whom the antagonists brand as provocateurs for daring to challenge their will and to call on the rule of law), you will be left with gritty questions to chew as you ponder the essence of democracy, fairness, and justice. I caught it on the first night of a weekend run at the Museum of Fine Arts Houston. 4 stars.

Mission to Mir: IMAX (1997)

Mission to MIR is a fine documentary -- that's documentary as in education, not entertainment, so if your brain hits the snooze button when it comes to rocket science, go watch Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. This IMAX movie relates what it's like for the American astronauts who train with the Russian cosmonauts at Star City, 32 km NE of cold snowy Moscow, and launch from the Baikonur Cosmodrome, the world's largest rocket complex in Kazakhstan, for their months-long assignments in the MIR module of the International Space Station. Being an astronaut floating weightless above the Earth is way cool no matter from which of the six degrees of freedom you look at it, despite the challenges of material and societal isolation and physical atrophy that must be faced. Shannon Lucid is the primary lens through whom more than half of this documentary is presented, and her infectious laughter and enthusiasm makes a visible difference in the morale of her fellow astronauts. These astronauts are not only the best of our best but they study Russian for three years before training and working and living in space for months while speaking only Russian -- so take a nap on your own time and learn about something cosmically cool with this DVD. Spaceflight is much too enlightening to make me ever snooze. It's true that an IMAX film loses some of its impact in the translation from a 52-by-72-foot screen (average size) to a computer or TV screen that's 2-4 percent of that size but the soundtrack (voice and music) was in perfect shape on my copy of the disc. I give it less than 4 stars only because it's less exciting than other IMAX space documentaries I've enjoyed. 3.5 stars.

Make Way for Ducklings and More Robert McCloskey Stories (2004)

Make Way for Ducklings was the first library book I read as a child. This Scholastic DVD is a nice presentation of this storybook and four others by Robert McCloskey that were published from the 1940s to the 1960s. In "Make Way for Ducklings" (1941, Caldecott Medal winner), a mallard family takes up residence in Boston's Public Garden (4 stars). In "Blueberries for Sal" (1948, Caldecott Honors winner), Little Sal and Little Bear mix up their mothers while picking and eating blueberries (3.5 stars). "Time of Wonder" (1957, Caldecott Medal winner) describes the beauty of a summer (including a passing hurricane) on the Maine seacoast (4 stars). "Burt Dow: Deep Water Man" (1963) is sort of Popeye meets Jonah inside a whale (3 stars) and in "Lentil" (1940), a small-town boy's harmonica playing helps greet a returning war hero and civic leader (3.5 stars). Read-along features and a Spanish version of Make Way for Ducklings are included. Overall 3.5 stars.

The Fifth Element (1997)

Bruce Willis and the rest of the ensemble cast are superb in The Fifth Element, an exceptional science-fiction movie of vision and creativity from director Luc Besson. Formerly a top military asset, Korben Dallas (Willis) now leads a shattered civilian life and drives a battered hovercab -- until he is caught up in several intrigues (from the forces of good, the forces of evil, and the government) that intersect and work at cross purposes to each other throughout the movie to suspenseful if often comic effect. Gary Oldman is droll though vile as Jean-Baptiste Emanuel Zorg, a megacorporate tycoon who dispenses weapons and death as easily as he flicks away a spent cigarette. Ian Holm is Father Vito Cornelius, a nervous priest entrusted with a mission from God. And Milla Jovovich is perfect as Leeloo (short for Leeloo Minai Lekarariba Laminai-Tchai Ekbat De Sebat in the Divine Language), the avatar/warrior long promised to save the Universe from destruction -- but she will need help in her darkest hour. I also love every actor in this movie -- from Major Iceborg to the mugger -- and the costumes, my Lord, the costumes! Also don't miss Chris Tucker, who is hilarious as the shock VJ Ruby Rhod (think Prince meets Little Richard). The script is excellent and full of memorable and comic lines, however, the music is simply unforgettable, most notably Plavalaguna's concert before all mayhem breaks loose at the resort. (The soundtrack was electronically engineered to showcase the alien Diva's superhuman vocal coloraturas.) Does Bruce Willis save the day and get the girl? (What do you think?) But it's the panache with which he does so that's totally entertaining! I had to own this movie and will watch it anytime at the drop of a hat. If you like science fiction, you just may too. The thing is, though, even if you have never liked science fiction, you'll surely like this -- The Fifth Element is that good! It should appeal to a broad audience from geeks to fashion models, from action fans to true romantics. 5 stars.

Moulin Rouge! (2001)

Baz Luhrmann's genius oeuvre, Moulin Rouge, is a tour-de-force of musical synergy and whimsy. It conveys power and delight through original arrangements of anachronistic pop hits -- all wrapped around a musical package called (as the story within the story) Spectacular Spectacular. Not only does Moulin Rouge turn every narrative convention you'd expect on its ear, it's incredibly fun -- and who knew Nicole Kidman and Ewan McGregor could sing like that? (Their secret lovers' song "Come What May" is soaringly and unforgettably romantic.) Our story begins (as McGregor's Christian narrates his own tale) when a "penniless writer" in turn-of-the-century Montmarte aspires to lyrically celebrate "the Bohemian values of freedom, truth, and love" (a phrase I now cannot think of without hearing John Leguizamo's Toulouse-Lautrec pronouncing it as "fweedom, twooth, and lwuv"). Through a comedy of errors, Christian happens upon a Bohemian acting troupe that needs a writer. He is introduced to the courteMoviettesan Satine (Kidman) while she expects to shower her favors on a rich investor in the Moulin Rouge and her career. The pair falls in love and, under the pretext of preparing the musical production, hides their secret dalliance from the slimy investor (Richard Roxburgh). Harold Zidler (Jim Broadbent), the unctuous stage manager, puts the kibosh on Satine's romance before the investor discovers the truth and sets his thug in motion. Will love endure? Will the show go on? Moulin Rouge is as wild as a menagerie (or a menage-a-trois) and its song-and-dance numbers are numerous and awesome, paying layered tribute to every vocal tradition and musical genre, from opera to rap, most notably with riffs on Mario Lanza, the Beatles, Bollywood, Elton John, Sting, Madonna, and Lady Marmalade. Here is a great musical production within a musical production, irreverent as well as eclectic, and so much fun you'll probably say after it ends "Now *that* was different!" or "Let's watch it again!" (or both). 5 stars.

Enemy of the State (1998)

I love a good technothriller and that word describes Enemy of the State to a tee. In my opinion, only the recent Eagle Eye tops it for a technothriller based on spy-satellite technology. Will Smith is excellent in everything he does -- as is Gene Hackman -- and the high-speed surveillance vignettes between scenes really make the movie for me -- conveying a sense of pressing pursuit by the Powers That Be and evading pursuit by Smith and Hackman. (I also recommend seeing Harrison Ford in Patriot Games and Hackman with Ford in The Conversation.) Sure, most of the tropes have been used before -- clothes planted at a murder scene to frame the targeted whistleblower, clothes laced with surveillance bugs and global-position transponders, evil government conspiracies -- but Enemy of the State marshals it all together quite masterfully. It even crosses all that with a subplot involving an FBI stakeout of a mafia operation that results in a major ballistic brouhaha. I'll watch this one any time and I'd like to own it. 4.5 stars. (5-4-09 posted 6-24-09)

Gone with the Wind: Collector's Edition (1939)

I've finally seen Gone With the Wind, so now (according to some) I can officially be considered cultured -- although I suspect those who claim Gone With the Wind is the best movie ever made are all women in the south. (Men from the north or the south tend to claim either The Godfather or The Deerhunter as the best movie ever made.) In retrospect, I have two words: Four hours! Is this America's answer to War and Peace? Is Scarlett our Anna Karenina? Is a pouty drama queen our best claim to cinematic royalty? True, after the war she drops the "drama princess" mien of a protected southern debutante, faces reality, and toughens her outlook: "As God as my witness, I will do whatever it takes ... I will never be hungry again!" She never surrenders her means of manipulation, however, and in fact only sharpens such skills. It's worthwhile to note that, despite her initially childish motives for choosing and pursuing two will-o'-the-wisp men, neither of these men were strong enough to stand up to her. Perhaps she intuitively chose them precisely so that she could continue to get what she wanted (a strategy that didn't work so well with her first marriage). Only Rhett was man (and clear-eyed realist) (and selfish) enough to stand up to her and to tell her No when she needed it -- or to show her the rejection she had visited upon others when playing by her rules of vested self-interest. Gone With the Wind is a southern diorama of pre- and post-Civil War society seen through the personal ambitions and frustrations of Kate Scarlett O'Hara Kennedy (Vivian Leigh). It's a moral play that is most interesting to me when the (mostly) amoral Rhett Butler (Clark Gable) dispenses his clear-eyed observations on Scarlett's misbegotten motives. The two ultimately forge a tacit if not mutual understanding for a time but Rhett abruptly cuts the anchor line, leading to Scarlett's most memorable query and his most notorious reply ("Frankly, Scarlett ..."). Scarlett always was and always will be a force of nature, a turbulent wake for all who knew her and for whom only the Civil War itself could be a greater firestorm. 5 stars. (5-11-09 posted 6-24-09)

The Human Face (2001)

Maybe it's the influence of a mugging Charlie Callas on me at age 14 but I've loved John Cleese since finding him in college, even forgiving his slightly dated bits (of comedy not countenance). In fact, I can never think of the word "DVD" without hearing Cleese say it. I caught the fourth episode of this BBC special on TV a while back and found it so enjoyable that I finally circumvented some queue time by picking up The Human Face at my public library. Disc 1 carries all four 50-minute episodes; Disc 2 has (not very) extended versions of several interviews and a puffery of other bits. That said, Cleese worked on The Human Face for a year and it shows. Amidst excellent production values, every part of it bears the man's touch -- his personable narration and dialog as well as his personable mug, sometimes in costume and drag. Elizabeth Hurley plays his tetchy sidekick, including an entire episode where her supine face is the stage for a miniaturized Cleese's shenanigans (and hers back at him). If you are a Cleese fan, you should be amused by his peripatetic palaver and whimsical vignettes; even though a few of his bits date back to vaudeville, this is Cleese after all and a thoroughly likeable fellow (in a dry British humor kind of way). In short, he has the candor and can-do to bring this sort of thing off. The set's four episodes are titled Face to Face, What Are You Looking At?, Beauty, and Fame. Discussion begins with human facial recognition (a skill to which perhaps a third of our brain is devoted). It then ranges through congenital and postcongenital defects in the human face and the ability to recognize faces. Finally, we observe the selection of the next "it girl" and sit in on the casting evaluations of three hopeful male actors. What's amazing is how one cosmetic surgeon has developed a facial map based on and validating the geometrical symmetry of what the vast majority of people consider to be beautiful in a face -- any face. As always, Cleese personably and intelligently interviews such a variety of people and weaves the whole into a sensible, urbane, and informative seminar on the importance of the human face amidst human society. 4.5 stars.

MARS Dead or Alive: Nova (2004)

Mars: Dead or Alive is an excellent Nova documentary that tracks the design, construction, and space launch of the twin Mars rovers, Spirit and Opportunity. Computer-based animations of the Mars launch, landing, and rover ground operations are top-notch -- almost photorealistic -- and video excerpts from the rovers' design, testing, and troubleshooting processes are highly illustrative -- esp. since half of the footage is interspersed with a half-dozen systems and program supervisors talking about their do-or-die efforts to remedy design flaws in the parachute and airbag delivery and other systems, in some cases right up to the day of the first rover's launch. (The footage was filmed during the design before any one of the program's 600 scientists and engineers knew whether their rovers would be finished by the launch window -- which only comes every two years -- much less survive the Mars landing.) If you love space flight, you will share the tenterhooks of suspense that the JPL and NASA team members felt before and during the rovers' launch and esp. during their landings. (Two-thirds of all flights previously sent to Mars have not survived.) And there's nothing like nerd exhilaration when a Mars landing succeeds. (Jump up and down and break out the grape Nehi?) Be sure to see the companion Nova documentary about the rovers' exploration of Mars itself. Also check out the extra features' candid interview with Donna Shirley (donnashirley.com), program co-head for the original Mars rover, Sojourner Truth. 4 stars.

Star Trek (2009)

Even the trailers make it clear that Chris Pine as a young and supremely confident Captain Kirk likes to fight and fly without a safety net. J.J. Abrams' reboot of the Star Trek franchise truly pulls out all the stops to "boldly go where no one has gone before" as it explores James Tiberius Kirk's traumatic birth, rebellious youth, and iconoclastic path from Star Fleet Academy to immediate field promotion as captain of the U.S.S. Enterprise. This is not your father's Star Trek (Original Series)! While well-rooted in the characters, idiosyncrasies, and touchstones any lifelong fan would expect in such an ur-Trek movie, this super-reboot is completely fresh and filled to the brim with space debris and adrenaline. First we witness Kirk's birth in the midst of a decisive battle that will set the course for his life. Next we see how a young Kirk develops a knack for clawing his way back from the edge of a precipice -- a skill that will serve him well in battles to come. Later he picks up a Star Fleet gauntlet that holds the greater challenge and blazes a path to become the youngest Star Fleet captain ever. The action is pretty much nonstop and should thrill extreme-sports fans and Trekkies. Eric Bana plays a Romulan rebel who is intent on repeating history -- something to do with sins of the fathers or revenge or insanity or jealousy, who knows? Maybe it's just me but he's never convincingly angry or dangerous. I mean, just look at his tattooed male-pattern-baldness and try not to chuckle. The casting is generally good though esp. with Chris Pine as Kirk and Karl Urban as Bones. (He channels DeForest Kelley well and we learn the origin of his nickname and also perhaps his attitude as a frustrated romantic.) John Cho as the freshman helmsman Ikaru Sulu gets to have his swashbuckling way and we briefly get introduced to Simon Pegg as Scotty, the triumphant uberengineer. Bonus points: Zoe Saldana as Nyota Uhura is hotter and smarter than ever (and has a thing for one of the crew.) We even have Chekhov, Sarek, Amanda Grayson, and Christopher Pike -- but where's Janice Rand with her blonde beehive? Though less brash than Kirk, Zachary Quinto as freshman officer Spock is the best character in the movie. Leonard Nimoy even has an excellent cameo. It goes without saying that this Star Trek movie is better than the TV classic series and the first six movies for action and special effects but also for characterization and comedy if not always drama. Every Trek fan needs to see it but also any sci-fi or action fan. If you like the new Transformers or Battlestar Galactica then fly at warp speed to see this movie. 4.5 stars.

Magnificent Desolation: Walking on the Moon (2005)

If you love the space program, you will appreciate this paean to its past accomplishments and future potential. Boil down Tom Hanks' astoundingly excellent and inspiring five-DVD production From the Earth to the Moon into one 40-minute 3D IMAX documentary and you have Magnificent Desolation, a fitting touchstone to the lunar exploration program that justifiably and honorably commemorates what only twelve men (plus all those supporting these astronauts) have done and what humanity should inevitably do again: return to the moon, perhaps even with the present generation. (I won't give away the film's ending, which thrilled me from head to toe, but remember the name of of the young girl Victoria Lugo in the children's questions segment.) That said, I have to address the criticisms of those who bash this film out of shortsightedness and lack of imagination. The description clearly promises an "IMAX film" (universally seen by schoolchildren and families in science museums) with new "photographs, CGI renditions, and NASA footage." (I should add the IMAX edition would have been phenomenal in 3D; though the library edition I viewed to save a rental slot was not 3D, I plan to rent what this service pictures as a 3D edition and view it with 3D glasses.) Yet here is how many criticized this movie: "I expected mostly historical film footage yet got mostly 'fake' CGI footage. Geared to kids. Fluffy. Pro-NASA. Disappointing." Excuse me? There is plenty of archival footage but it doesn't predominate because this is not an archival disc. The CGI is completely top-notch and authentic (thanks to Lucasfilm) but most importantly, its large format and high resolution make the lunar missions come alive. (After all, you can barely discern Neil Armstrong's ghostly first step on the moon in the live and archival footage.) I also loved the humor Tom Hanks inserted into the rapid-fire moon vignettes (you have to be quick to catch all the historical and cultural references) and the childrens' quiz (reinforcing the point that our kids are not being taught about this greatest of humanity's technological achievements). Finally, no, they didn't pull together every astronaut to read his own quotes; actors (John Corbett, Matt Damon, Morgan Freeman, Tom Hanks, Colin Hanks, Matthew McConaughey, Paul Newman, Bill Paxton, Kevin Pollak, Gary Sinise, John Travolta, and others) did just fine. This documentary makes you feel as if you are on the moon! For similar offerings, click my avatar and see my 3D, IMAX, astronauts, and Planet Earth lists. 5 stars.

It's the Pied Piper, Charlie Brown (2000)

It's true that It's the Pied Piper, Charlie Brown is not a "classic" Peanuts animated special like the first one (A Charlie Brown Christmas), made 35 years earlier with the Vince Guaraldi jazz score -- but that doesn't make it "noncanonical" as some have complained. So let's look at the facts. First, the drawings of Charlie and Lucy Brown and the others have cleaner, simpler lines -- they look more generic and less uniquely Schulzesque. (This disc was released in the same year of his passing after an illness made him unable to draw the strip himself.) Most importantly, this retelling of a fairy tale also breaks with tradition by depicting extensive scenes of the actions and dialog of adults -- always something previously avoided in the child-centric Peanuts universe -- however, the adults (two silent parents, six fussing maids, and eight singing and dancing town administrators) only appear within the body of the fairy tale itself! (Perhaps the Peanuts gang could have populated the entire program as they did in the Mayflower crossing and first Thanksgiving portrayals but I think rejecting this show on such grounds alone is making a mountain out of a molehill.) Lastly, however, the fairy tale is framed front and back by maybe 5 minutes of Peanuts gang animation. So I'd say while not exactly noncanonical, this disc is definitely non-Schulzical (and, some would say, nonsensical). If you agree, console yourself by watching the "exclusive" interview with Charles Schulz as he explains the origins and characters of Charlie Brown, Snoopy, Lucy, Linus, Sally, Peppermint Patty, Marcie, Pigpen, and Woodstock. You'll see that nonsense is entirely within the Schulzian realm! (Guaraldi's famous theme song is called Whimsy Salad after all.) Also important, I don't think the music and dance scenes drag on more than in any classic Peanuts animation (and I love the line-dancing, soccer-playing mice)! So in closing, if you ever visit St. Paul (Schulz's hometown and mine too) be sure to visit O'Gara's Grill, the former site of Sparky's dad's barber shop. Or be sure to visit Santa Rosa with the Charles Schulz skating rink, gallery, and museum across the street from Schulz's home! 3 stars.

Knuffle Bunny & More Great Childhood Adventure Stories (2007)

Knuffle Bunny etc. is a delightful compilation of six children's storybooks, each presented with original illustrations that are enhanced by transitional animation plus fine narrator and character voices. I wasn't previously acquainted with any of the stories in print form though I can understand how Knuffle Bunny is so popular and a Caldecott Honor book. (1) Knuffle Bunny, written and illustrated by Mo Willems, is voiced by the actual father, mother, and daughter of the authorial family. Cute as the dickens, Knuffle Bunny is a real charmer (esp. for tots and tykes)! 4.5 stars. (2) Written by Carl Best and illustrated by Giselle Potter, Shrinking Violet's illustrations have a quasi-Russian caricature style and their limited animation (gently bobbing heads, torsos, and limbs) gives them a bobblesque surrealism that fits well. Moreover, the story (narrated by Calista Flockhart) is a good one for children in primary to middle school because of the theme, which is how to deal with ridicule and self-consciousness. 3.5 stars. (3) Possum Magic, written and narrated by Mem Fox and illustrated by Julie Vivas, has wonderfully drawn animal illustrations; every one looks as fuzzy as you'd expect, even the magically invisible baby Hush. Even better than the Australian author/narrator, the didgeridoo soundtrack is understated yet unforgettable. 4 stars. (4) Planting a Rainbow, written and illustrated by Lois Ehlert, is a beautiful choral poem of bright colors and botanical variety. 4 stars. (5) Lindsay Crouse narrates Brave Irene, written and illustrated by William Steig, where a sick seamstress's daughter battles a snowstorm to deliver a fancy dress to the duchess. 3.5 stars. (6) David de Vries narrates Will I Have a Friend?, written by Miriam Cohen and illustrated by Lillian Hoban, where Jim ponders and finds a friend on his first day at kindergarten. 3 stars. This collection is a read-along DVD. Overall 3.5 stars.

The Man Who Came to Dinner (1941)

Playwright George S. Kaufman's and Moss Hart's brilliant script gets a good screenplay and some good screen play in the film adaptation of The Man Who Came to Dinner, a wicked light comedy reprising Monte Wooley as Sheridan Whiteside (a character deliberately modeled on the acerbic Alexander Woolcott after a similar overnight stay at Hart's own estate). I always love an intelligent, fast-paced, conversational script and this one rarely disappoints with its ripostes, bon mots, invectives, and satiric rips back and forth -- usually from the direction of Whiteside to anyone else in the room (or leaving it) but quite often from the reverse direction via his cousin and secretary of 10 years, Maggie Cutler (Bette Davis in an entirely satisfactory if uncharacteristic role). Whiteside is in his element when he's ordering everyone around, from the ball-bearing magnate homeowner and his midwestern socialite wife (who seems to be channeling a warbly Glinda the Good Witch) to their marriageable daughter and son to the long-suffering Nurse Preen (Mary Wickes, who gets the worst of his digs) and the homeowners' cook and maid (who come to love the lug). (At the end of the movie, Whiteside offers them jobs and they gladly accept. "They've been with me for 10 years!" laments the lady of the house. "I'll commute their sentence," Whiteside replies.) The handsome local newspaper editor (Richard Travis) plays a major role, causing Whiteside to simper gleefully at the mischief he conceives for his own purposes. A gold-digging actress (Ann Sheridan) plays her part in his trap until Whiteside gets a final glint in his eye as to what to do about it (and her). Whiteside's friend, an equally mischievous entertainer named Banjo (Jimmy Durante), never looked so young. Like other catty scripts from Kaufman in the 1930s and 1940s (such as The Marx Brothers), this production is conversationally spry and steadfastly sharp. It's entertaining and funny, however, it feels light as a trifle by the time it's through. I'd say it's too intelligent to be a popcorn muncher (or you'd miss the clever dialog) but too calorically (comedically) light to stick to one's mental or emotional ribs. It's better than adequate but I can't say I deeply like it (as much as others that I do), which leaves me at 3.5 stars.

Defiance (2008)

Defiance is a gripping and memorable portrayal of the true story of how the Bielski brothers ultimately sheltered 1,200 Polish Jews in the forests surrounding their former villages, preserving them from slaughter at the hands of German Nazis. Three Bielski brothers survived the Nazi invasion of their homeland during World War II to lead quiet lives in New York City; only after the death of Tuvia in 1983 did their story of exceptional leadership, heroism, and sacrifice come to light. Defiance is Fiddler on the Roof meets Miracle at St. Anna; scenes of battle and slaughter commingle with scenes of human pathos and hope (much of it universal yet mostly inimical to the persecution of Jews throughout history). The alternating rancor and detente between Tuvia (Daniel Craig) and his less circumspect brother Zus (Liev Schreiber) also contributes a polar cycle of pragmatism vs. altruism that connects gritty battle scenes to gritty stragglers' life in the woods. In the end, no one's hands are clean of blood -- all are guilty (through action or inaction as well as through outright misguided intent or good intent gone awry) and in need of forgiveness (of self and of others) even as most make courageous sacrifices (small or large, secret or heroic) to preserve each others' lives. Ultimately, implies the subtext, we are all human beings -- complex, conflicted, yet courageous. Defiance (and its Jewish encampment) is helmed by the icily-blue-eyed Daniel Craig as Tuvia, the compassionate and reluctant warrior who pronounces, "They may treat us like animals -- but we will not become animals." Defiance is a sustained, coherent tour-de-force of the triumph of the human spirit against the crushing will of genocidal monsters as well as the aggravating sins of selfishness and strife. Even though it's not as iconically powerful as The Killing Fields, it's more accessible, so I feel compelled to give it 5 stars.

Rudy (1993)

Rudy is an inspiring family-oriented film about finding the motivation to accomplish your dreams. Rudy is My Dog Skip meets Friday Night Lights minus the dog and replacing fanatical Texas high school football with dyed-in-the-wool Notre Dame college football. The movie is based on the true story of Rudy Ruettiger, played by Sean Astin (who, ten years later as Samwise Gamgee in Lord of the Rings, would utter the words "Please, Mr. Frodo -- don't let him turn me into anything ... unnatural"). Sean's specialties seem to be dewy-eyed looks, curly brown locks, and indefatigable optimism. (He's as cute as a puppy dog, plays the role of the underdog to a tee, and takes a licking but keeps on ticking.) The way this youngest (and dyslexic) son takes knocks from his family and the townfolk greatly endears him to families who watch this movie -- but even more so how he clings to and intensely pursues his dream to apply to and attend the University of Notre Dame and to play football with the Fighting Irish. "I'll do anything, coach!" is his refrain off the field while "I can do it!" is his refrain on the field. Indeed, the coach ultimately wishes his players had half the heart that Rudy shows in spades. Families (esp. Catholic or football-loving ones) will love Rudy and enjoy it again and again. Personally, I can appreciate the story more than the pro forma script, directing and acting. Ned Beatty as Rudy's father feels like he's holding back and, in what should be the most emotional scene, we are turned away from Sean's face to view him from behind before we hear him burble a bit and walk away. Even one of Sean's trademark dewy-eyed looks and a few murmured words would have been closer to what anyone would consider to be acting in this scene. So to sum up, I love the story even though the movie didn't grab me as emotionally as I think it does for most people who read their feelings into the characters; I just prefer it when characters portray the feelings the script calls for. Rudy is the underdog to root for though, so be sure to see it with your family. I suspect your kids will love it even more than you do. 3.5 stars.

Bela Fleck: Throw Down Your Heart (2008)

Throw Down Your Heart presents a soulful encounter between the music of the American banjo and Africa, where it is believed the banjo originated. The bright tangy (and sometimes twangy) tones of the banjo are delightfully represented by banjo virtuoso and ad hoc musical ambassador Bela Fleck. You could not imagine a whiter guy than Bela as he wends his way across the continent befriending, jamming, and recording with tribal and village musicians in Uganda and Tanzania on Africa's east coast as well as international music icons in Gambia and Mali on Africa's west coast. We witness a village's construction of a hippo-sized wooden marimba that resonates so loudly it sounds (in Bela's words) like a rock band. We see the construction of native stringed instruments and learn what is known of the birth of the banjo. The title of this documentary comes from an oral history about the slave trade that reportedly led to the invention of the banjo; its dulcet tones with other remnants of Africa's musical heritage helped the slaves survive their harsh ocean transport and servitude in the New World. As one musician observes, Bela is not a talkative guy but he plays music that reaches the heart. So do the evocative souls he meets and befriends through music. Music is an international language and this production is proof of it, heart and soul. I saw this movie with an adult and a preteen on the first evening of a three-day run at the Houston Museum of Fine Arts and we greatly enjoyed it. See the DVD when it arrives and listen to the CD too. 4 stars.

The Bronx Bunny Show (2007)

The Bronx Bunny Show is so deliberately rancid that it could be the brainchild of Adam Corolla or Seth Green on acid. Properly viewed, it will make you throw up a little in your mouth. However, you'll probably just laugh your fool head off if you're part of its target demographic: fans of Jackass, reality TV, women's wrestling, porn, and Star Trek. Filmed live from what is supposed to be a visibly spunk-stained sofa in a filthy apartment in east L.A., the Bronx Bunny is an ugly bug-eyed brown bunny from da Bronx. His sidekick, Teddie T, is an ugly bug-eyed panda with numerous addictions and illnesses that cause him to be phlegmatic (and not in a good way) with the guest stars. The Bronx Bunny Show is Jiminy Glick meets Crank Yankers in da hood: Every fifth word is a blistering vulgarity, every line involves busting each other's chops with sexual and scatological slams, it's not clear whether every guest star is clued in on the schtick (Jolene Blalock looks sincerely shocked), and almost every show excerpts an R-rated tongue-in-cheek (and not in the usual sense) porn video starring Teddie T. I watched 7 out of 10 episodes at 15 minutes each (including the schmoozing Steve Schirripa from The Sopranos and vain Kelly Carlson from Nip/Tuck, oozing Michael Rapaport from nothing important and so-o-o gay George Takei from Star Trek, conceited wrestler Chris Jericho and self-kidding Mark Hamill from Star Wars, posing rapper Method Man and disingenuous Tina Majorino from Napoleon Dynamite, health-conscious Howie Mandel in absolutely the wrong place, vapid lady wrestler Stacy Keibler, pandering Eric Roberts and sincere Robin Leach, straight-up if put-upon Richard Schiff from The West Wing, and sweet Jolene Blalock from Star Trek: Enterprise), but I couldn't justify sitting through Joely Fisher or the remaining no-name actors. These two are real characters -- just gritty and edgy ones. IW. 2 stars.

Bride and Prejudice (2004)

Since Moulin Rouge doesn't count, seeing Bride and Prejudice last night was my first Bollywood-style movie experience -- and I liked it a lot as far as the genre goes. The costumes, choreography, and musical numbers are impressive and fun to be sure. The main characters' acting is acceptable and every character is funny at some point -- though some (Lalita's parents and esp. Kholi) are throwaway caricatures. D'Arcy here was Balrai who seemed to be channeling Colin Firth quite a bit. The snarkiness against American capitalism followed by fawning to obtain its benefits -- pro-India arrogance vs. rank opportunism even to the point of abandoning one's proud heritage in the blink of an eye -- was always interesting. I considered drumming this movie down to 3.5 stars because of Kholi's overplayed oafish snorting (too much, methinks) but I suspect the goofy whimsy and exotic gestalt of this movie will only grow on me -- so I'll give it a straight 4 stars.

Arranged (2007)

A cinematic gem thanks to the authenticity of its actors, Arranged is a thoughtful and sensitive treatment of the "traditional" Muslim or Orthodox Jewish practice of arranged marriage, particularly as it occurs in America. Indeed, the movie's central premise looks precisely at what happens when two young women -- one Jewish and one Muslim -- teach at the same grade school in Brooklyn and become friends during their families' campaigns to find each woman a suitable husband. Think of Arranged as My Big Fat Muslim/Jewish Wedding but without all the wild drama -- just the domestic angst. Each woman's embedded anticipation of a carefully vetted yet compatible mate is compared with what passes for courtship in the modern world (which the school's principal, semi-channeling Steve Carell as Michael Scott in The Office, offensively asserts is a superior means of matchmaking) as well as each woman's internal struggle with the process. The crux comes as each woman wants to remain true to her faith and her family yet also to preserve her free will, exercise her intuition, and have a say in the selection of whom she would marry. All members of the cast (esp. our leading ladies) convey a marvelous on-screen chemistry; the story drew me in and held my attention from start to finish. For its laudably open and transparent presentation of a fundamental emotional dilemma, Arranged reminds me somewhat of Bella, Maria Full of Grace, or Paradise Now -- though, naturally, to a lesser degree than those (to me) 5-star movies. 4.5 stars.

New In Town (2009)

New in Town is a warmly affectionate and humorous tale of love and community spirit set in the winter wonderland (or frigid wasteland) of Minnesota. The movie didn't linger long at the box office and it took longer than expected to arrive on DVD, probably because half the country has no interest in frozen tundra and the 45 states that are not Minnesota or its neighbors have little interest in "yah, sure, yew betcha" country. The folksy Minnesota dialect here is authentic yet understated -- not acerbically omnipresent as in Fargo -- and the soundtrack is rich in Celtic and alt-rock tunes. The dialog is mostly clean (just a handful of coarse words), small-town midwestern values are strong, and the Christian faith is supportively represented. Our story begins as Lucy (Renee Zellweger), a driven executive on the CEO track in Miami, starts her day running then commuting to a meeting where she is assigned to fly out the next day and radically downsize a food-processing plant in New Ulm, Minnesota. (I love New Ulm, home of Schell's Brewery, but filming was actually in Winnepeg, Manitoba.) She arrives in the dead of winter with no winter wear, which is played to comic effect. (Her flippant "How bad could it be?" before venturing outdoors becomes a "Holy mother--!" tirade that is cut off by the airport's automatic doors. Later, upon arriving as a guest for a home-cooked meal on her first evening in town, she spies in the bathroom mirror why her hosts thought she might be "a little cold.") Pratfalls in the snow and ice occur in due season even as Renee's corporate "monkey" buzzwords fall on deaf ears. She even gets off to a bad start with the union boss (Harry Connick Jr.) but they eventually come to a meeting of the minds (and more). (I had only two concerns: a parent getting caught "offsides" after ensuring his daughter would come home at 10:30 pm with her virtue intact on prom night and Renee's increasingly bizarre complexion -- her face looked like it had gone through barbed wire during the second half of the movie.) Renee gradually warms up to the town and things get hunky dory. Whimsical elements of the script include six townswomen's "scrapping" klatsch, where their dialect and scrapbooking handicraft receive sympathetic treatment, plus tubs and tubs of tapioca and (in the deleted scenes) several sneaky gnome-sized "trolls." (Two-thirds of the many deleted scenes were rightly deleted but I would argue that keeping the troll scenes would have given this movie an even quirkier charm that might have won over a borderline cult fan following.) If you like Grumpier Old Men and Kitchen Stories then you will likely enjoy New in Town. 4.5 stars. (5-29-09)

Night at the Museum 2: Battle of the Smithsonian (2009)

Traffic was exceptionally light during Memorial Day weekend so there were empty seats for the opening night of Night at the Museum 2. (Tickets were sold out for the Science Museum showings though.) I hope families will catch it during the coming weeks though since I liked the sequel better than the first installment. The franchise (if it can be called that) still casts most of the same characters -- with a few exceptionally interesting additions -- but to my mind there's just more plot, action, dialog, and humor. Detractors fault this sequel for relying on physical humor but there's not so much -- and anyway, I love slapstick (as does Ben Stiller, if you survey his career). To sum up, Night 2 is significantly more fun and funny. Larry (Stiller) has left a successful museum career to find a measure of fame as an infomercial entrepreneur -- but in doing so, he has lost his way. He returns to the museum when it needs him the most -- though it may be too late. A wonderfully breezy Amelia Earhart (Amy Adams) helps Larry repeatedly escape from and ultimately confound the hilariously lisping Akmun Ra (Hank Azariah) who, despite having the best lines, wants to become dark lord of the universe with the help of Ivan the Terrible, Napoleon, and Al Capone (but he turns down Darth Vader). Creepy hawkheaded minions wielding spears and gangsters brandishing machine guns help him open a portal to the underworld but action and violence are muted; no one is shown getting hurt or killed, though some are threatened or thrown across the room. As a result, families with kids older than ages 6-8 should enjoy this movie immensely. Let's just be clear: This is a family movie. For families. It does not have a mature, structured script that can be compared to an art film's and obeys every law of physics and follows every codicil of history. If you have to think longer than it takes to chomp your present mouthful of popcorn, you are doing something wrong -- so stop complaining with your mouth full then swallow, refill, chomp, and repeat. And use your ears: If anything, Kamun Ra sounds more like Booberry than Stewie Griffin. 4.5 stars. (5-29-09)

Bringing Down the House (2003)

With a good script and director, Queen Latifah can fill a role exceptionally well, as she does in The Secret Life of Bees, Living Out Loud, and even her cardboard cutout role in Chicago. Unfortunately, Bringing Down the House is not such a cinematic exercise. Its basic premise -- an Internet romance switcheroo -- is a promising one and the movie carries off that part of it fairly well. (One of the funniest scenes in the movie is when Steve Martin opens his door and finds out who's really come for champagne -- and what a penny and a pound he's gotten himself into.) But I'm just not that interested in seeing Queen play a stereotypical oh-no-she-di'n't black girl-from-the-hood; where's the originality in being typecast? Steve really drops the ball in the last ten minutes with a lame, affected, tried-too-hard hip-hop caricature. (He was so straighforward and funny in The Jerk but paled here in comparison to his homey's chocolicious come-ons.) Eugene Levy totally makes up for everything else when he takes a shine to Queen and begins sweet-talking her. He is absolutely hilarious with his sincere, unaffected, white-bread jive-talk to his "Boo"! I think everyone needs to see the magic that is Eugene since he completely saves this movie from a 2-star purgatory for me. 3 stars.

A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965)

After growing up with these two classics since I was a boy, it's practically not the Christmas season without seeing the 2D animated specials The Grinch Who Stole Christmas (reviewed separately) and A Charlie Brown Christmas. The Peanuts Gang's Christmas special is so timeless and sweet that it reminds us of simpler times -- times that can still be ours in our homes and in our hearts, if we choose to set aside the artificial hustle and bustle of the season and to seek the spiritual meaning of the holiday (as Linus so ably spells out in his Nativity narration from Scripture). All the inimitable innocence of the Peanuts kids' voices are here -- Charlie Brown, Sally, Lucy, Linus, Schroeder, Pig Pen, Peppermint Patty, Marcie, and even Snoopy -- and the gang dances to the scatting piano chords of Vince Guaraldi's Whimsy Salad. Yes, the animation is simple and the audio is scratchy -- but that's part of why we love this show, now a 40-plus-year-old tradition. Don't miss it -- ever! 5 stars. (5-14-09 posted 5-19-09)

Groundhog Day (1993)

Bill Murray has a true classic in Groundhog Day and Andie McDowell sweetly plays the romantic foil that his schmuck needs to finally escape from a one-day-in-time self-made hell. Bill plays Phil, a snarky TV weatherman who is climbing the career ladder towards a reputably large metro market. Unfortunately, his annual bottom-of-the-barrel assignment sends him to cover Groundhog Day in Punxsatawney, Pa. He takes it on the chin like a prima donna -- sniping at Andie, his producer, and Chris Elliott, his cameraman -- only to learn (each morning at 6 am) that he apparently has been condemned to repeat the day -- over and over and over again -- presumably until he gets it right. What must he do? He has no idea. He has to discover the answer by trial and error -- over and over and over again -- and herein lies the true magic of this movie. His daily encounters with ordinary citizens -- beginning with the improbably named Stephen Tobolowsky as clueless insurance salesman Ned Ryerson ("am I right or am I right?") -- and the associative and distributive, positive and negative, and even sometimes cumulative lessons he learns from them are the bread and butter of this wonderful situational comedy. Put Bill (as Phil the weatherman not Phil the groundhog) in a sticky wicket -- or a wicker basket -- and see how he pokes and prods to try to get out. That's how this movie works -- and it works marvelously. I love this movie and can't see myself ever getting tired of seeing it one more time. 5 stars.

Bionicle: Mask of Light: The Movie (2003)

The world of Bionicle, with its Toa warrior action figure series and back story from Lego, form an interesting proof of concept. As mechanistic bipeds with personal arsenals, the toys look good and boys enjoy assembling and playing with them. Unfortunately, this first of three Bionicle movies is mostly murky. Our story begins as a timid little guy is "chosen" (why? and by whom?) to be steward of a mask of light that must be kept safe or darkness will consume the land of Mata Nui. All well and good but the 3D animation in this movie is so dark and low-res that it's hard to make out much of anything much less follow along. The climactic scene transpires on a dark cliff cloaked in shadows where a dark shield is thrown between dark pillars -- you get the idea: There is no "there" there. You should never watch this kid-nerd valentine unless you are a Bionicle fanboy. It's as obtuse to adults as any Barbie vignette (just swap tech-alien snips-and-snails for sugar-and-spice). Frankly, I don't see why the producers of kids' shows like this have to pander to the lowest denominator of entertainment. I mean, take a Shakespearean live actor -- that's the height of emotive interpretation and acting, right? Then take some bozo with no acting much less voice talent, draw a stilted digital stand-in for him on a computer, and dub his voice on a character lacking all potential for emotional expression because his face has been cloaked in a helmet. I'm just saying this is far from James Earl Jones as voice talent for David Prouse as Darth Vader. The most implied emotion you get is a shaking head or a glowing eye -- again, in the dim or the dark. 1.5 stars.

Hook (1991)

Robin Williams didn't carry this story well for me. He was too obsessive about work -- what kind of monster shows work is more important than his wife and children, even in a hamhandedly scripted movie? -- to believably have been someone who once insisted he would never grow up. I realize this contrast is the premise of the movie but it was too forced and unbelievable; Robin's face didn't carry the emotion for me. Even when faced with the necessary reconnecting with his inner Pan, it was a bit too formulaic and sudden for me not to chafe. It was a surprise to find Pan's stand-in has been the Hispanic boy Rufio -- but I guess we're Americanizing the British tale a la West Side Story. Julia Roberts as Tinkerbell was a gem whose character frankly carried more pathos for me than Pan himself. The stars of this movie are in fact the wild rumpus of lost boys and, of course, Dustin Hoffman as Capt. Hook. OK, maybe his eyebrows should have gotten top billing by themselves but he gives you a great idea of what the foppish and vain villain could have meant to the life expectancies of Peter Pan and the children. The best line is when the little girl scolds Hook, "You need a mother very badly!" Bob Hoskins as Smee was my favorite character. The climax was little more than a cartoon writ large in live action but Hook's costume will go down in the annals of movie costumes, won't it? Anyway if you love fairy tales or are a Peter Pan fan, be sure to see Hook. Sure, it could have been better but don't miss it if you can help it. Even weak Spielberg is still Spielberg! 3 stars.

The Princess Bride (1987)

The Princess Bride is one of my all-time top-ten favorite movies for two reasons. First, it's a whimsical comedic fairy tale that bends the rules. Second, the script is amazing in its originality and cheekiness plus the entire cast has such amazing comfort in their roles and chemistry together. This movie is so densely packed with superb dialog and one-liners that it's highly quotable with a shelf life of forever. I'll never tire of seeing it one more time! Our story begins with young Fred Savage -- home from school, sick in bed, and already bored with his Commodore 64 baseball video game. (Oh, the deprivation!) His grandpa, the mumblety-peg Peter Falk, comes by with a special book to read to him: The Princess Bride by S. Morgenstern. The boy is more interested in the promise of swordfights than romance but shrugs "I'll see if I can stay awake." The story develops a grip on him though since it is pure delight: The lovely girl Buttercup (Robin Wright Penn) discovers True Love with "Farm Boy" Westley (Cary Elwes) but after he goes to seek his fortune, news reaches her that "the dread Pirate Roberts" (who kills all prisoners) has taken his ship captive. The light goes out of her heart but her beauty wins the eye of the pompous Prince Humperdinck (Chris Sarandon), who plans to wed her (among other nefarious things). After an ultimatum, an impasse, subterfuge etc., Buttercup is kidnapped by three hired outlaws -- Spanish swordsman Inigo Montoya (Mandy Patinkin), dull giant Fezzik (Andre), conceited Sicilian Vizzini (Wallace Shawn) -- then pursued by the dread Pirate Roberts himself. Brilliant supporting roles and bit parts include the sociopathic Six-Fingered Man (Christopher Guest), Miracle Max (Billy Crystal) with his crone of a wife Valerie (Carol Kane). It is impossible to describe how much fun every character in this ensemble cast is or how perennially quotable the script is. (The list of my favorite quotes was as long as this review.) Even the soundtrack with Mark Knopfler's theme song is classic and sweet. For you to not love this movie would be "absolutely, totally, and in all other ways, inconceivable!" 5 stars.

Being There (1979)

Being There is a satirical commentary on the vapidity that our mass-media culture can induce in the weak-minded lower class -- and how thin the line between vapidity and fame can be among the weak-minded (or wishful-minded) upper class. Chance (Peter Sellers) has lived his entire life in the servants' quarters of his employer's mansion, serving as groundskeeper. His every material need provided for, he does nothing but watch TV in his spare time (and he seems mentally suited to little more). He doesn't even know his last name! One day, "the old man" dies and Chance is put out on the street. A wealthy acquaintance of his former employer dents Chance with a fender and takes him in; prompting himself to assume more than he should, the well-to-do and well-connected gentleman (Melvyn Douglas) hears "Chance the Gardner" and substitutes "Chauncy Gardiner." Soon, everything vapid that Chance utters is taken to be the deep and subtle pronouncements of a wise upper-crust peer of the old man. Talk show appearances, fetes, and receptions ensue. Chance: "The roots go deep..." Those hanging on his every word: "You mean the market fundamentals are sound and will rebound in due season! How wise!" Rumor even enhances his reputation sexually as women's imaginations run amok. The funniest scene in the movie is when the gent's wife (Shirley Maclaine) gets Chance alone in her bedroom and, noticing the TV, he says: "I like to watch..." Peter Sellers as Chance did minimalist humor decades before Bill Murray did it in Lost in Translation. Jerzy Kosinski's Being There is a classic that deserves to be seen and remembered by every generation. It will leave an impression on you. 4 stars. (4-17-09 posted 5-8-09)

Mars Attacks! (1996)

Take every aliens-are-coming!-themed movie since the dawn of time, add cotton candy and gin, mix, pour, and you'll probably get Tim Burton's Mars Attacks! Here is pure, gooey, science-fiction campiness -- cartoonish alien-invasion buffoonery in puppetry and live action. The bubble-helmeted, bug-eyed, skull-faced brainiacs that travel in dreamily hovering saucers from Mars to a disastrous mano-a-mano first-contact with the U.S. president (Jack Nicholson) make their genocidal intentions known in as broad a caricature of such a travesty as grim humor could allow. I give due credit to Pierce Brosnan for showing the dual-dangling pluckiness to appear in this production as the bemused pipe-smoking academic who (at the aliens' behest) trades heads with Sarah Jessica Parker and her chihuahua. (The next time he would show such besotted courage -- or wackiness -- he took a singing part in Mamma Mia!) The aliens' leering visages and creepy floating locomotion -- not to mention their ack! ack! ack-ack! chatter -- are so funny that they scream "You cannot be taking us seriously!" even as they scheme to rape Earth and pillage its population -- or perhaps it's the other way around? Finally, just so we know that Tim Burton is from the shallow end of Quentin Tarantino's gene pool, Earth's ultimate victory over the aliens comes straight out of Attack of the Killer Tomatoes. A must-see movie but (to me) less impressive on repeat viewings. 3.5 stars. (5-7-09)

The Bear (1988)

I saw Jean-Jacques (Quest for Fire) Annaud's The Bear in the theaters. A lonely bear orphan shadows a peckish male bear during migration and the two eventually stick together. There's no dialog in the whole movie save for a hunter's blurt during a confrontation with (to humans, it's) Mr. Bear. (Bring extra underwear.) Bart (who also appeared in Windwalker and The Edge) is one big bear and he's feeling his oats. He chews through the scenery -- and what scenery! The Bear is a great nature movie for the whole family -- the bear cub is as cute as, um, a bear cub -- just be sure the kiddos cover their eyes during the scene with the big slavering in-your-face-homo-sapiens! roar. An awesome movie for its silence and the wilderness. 5 stars.

Attack of the Killer Tomatoes (1978)

When I first saw Attack of the Killer Tomatoes, I was told it was such a bad movie because it had been made to intentionally "win" a Golden Turkey nomination. Well, that factoid can't be true because the Golden Turkeys were just a list of movies in a Michael Medved book that was published two years after the movie. So, Tomatoes earned a Turkey fair and square the normal way -- with blind, misguided sincerity! Our story begins as tubby schlub Mason Dixon is named the dopey American president's lead agent assigned to investigate reports of giant roaming killer tomatoes. The foraging tomatoes bounce or tumble ponderously and some reach the size of a (very rotund) cow. The script is fetid and the acting is memorably dank. (Nonplussed grandparents: "Oh no, a giant tomato's got Timmy." *Snarling, munching sounds off-camera*) The single funniest scene in this movie is the government conference room with barely enough space to sit in the chairs shoehorned around the conference table -- but to reach their chairs, everyone must crawl across the table to their places. (A Honeywell executive laughed when he saw this scene 25 years ago and said he'd been in government conference rooms just like that.) The international meeting's participants also have an entertaining language problem: "Technically, sir, tomatoes are fags." ("He means fruits.") "There's a little jap in the air." ("He means nip.") Eventually, someone comes up with a way to defeat the tomatoes -- provided they can all be herded into the stadium by throngs of extras and you can get the song "Puberty Love" out of your head after the movie ends. This is a hard clip of celluloid to describe or advocate for because you don't want to give it more credit than it deserves (which is very little). Still it's a perennial favorite among those who enjoy intentionally, memorably, and even delightfully bad movies. Scary Movie is Oscar material compared to this low-budget howler. I can also clearly attest it is better than Strangeheart, Throg, and Doggie Poo. I'll have to catch it again sometime -- once every 25 years seems about right. Pass the ketchup! 2.5 stars.

Fireproof (2008)

Fireproof is an independently produced, humanitarian movie that's different. It wasn't made by liberal-arts majors or garden-variety liberals about famine in Africa or the homeless in America. In fact, you'd hardly know it but the production crew was made up of inexperienced first-timers, all members of the same Baptist church that has chosen to make movies that might inspire people's lives for good. Fireproof is certainly not a blockbuster but neither is it low-budget. While Christian at its foundation, it's not churchy and any faith talk is a brief soft sell. Fireproof is not an action movie with a romantic subplot; it is a relationship movie with a little first-responder action to set the hook. Fireproof sincerely aims to save marriages at the human level by encouraging a practical rethinking and renewal to the mutual marital covenant commitment between one man and one woman -- one couple and one step at a time. Fireproof is an emotionally powerful movie that offers the potential for authentic spiritual rejuvenation. Based on the marriage-saving book called The Love Dare, it is the story of a thirtysomething married couple in trouble -- and don't knock this couple's anger if you haven't been in such a place in marriage. Caleb (Kirk Cameron) is a firefighter who is seethingly furious with his wife because he demands her respect and doesn't get it. (I eventually realized that he relates to her in the same testosterone-drenched pattern that he relates to his successful career, job, and male coworkers -- like that's going to work, dude.) Catherine (Erin Bethea) is frigidly angry with him but can't trust him emotionally or talk about it. (Hm, I wonder why.) They're approaching a precipice called divorce -- though the movie is timid about showing how they toy with exit paths like porn or flirting -- when Caleb's father urges his son to try reading and applying a book called Fireproof Your Marriage. It's a 40-day, 40-step program to strengthen or save a marriage; on the first day, for example, Caleb is simply to not say anything critical to Catherine that he would otherwise have said. Each day is one more substantive step in self-control and positive sacrifice, each added to the previous ones; it's hard and it shows. At first, Caleb thinks it is a checklist or a formula but over time he realizes his own inner personal change is what matters since that is all he is responsible for or can control (as is true with any individual spouse in any marriage). But changing one side of the equation may help the other find equilibrium. The wrapup is realistic and yields touching revelations. Fireproof is a movie that can deeply affect those who are prepared to be inspired. I for one am happy to have seen it (in the theater) and I hope any couple who seeks or enjoys the state of marriage will see it together. 4.5 stars.

Outland (1981)

Outland is 2001 meets High Noon, starring Sean Connery as the lone marshal. Largely dark and murky because it's set on a Jovian moon's space station, Outland has Alien-like accoutrements in its space helmets and landing pads and is truly a space western with showdowns aplenty. Frances Sternhagen is great as the wily doc who watches his back. 3.5 stars.

Seven (1995)

In Seven, Morgan Freeman and Brad Pitt are two police detectives chasing a gruesome serial killer with a sociopathic chip on his shoulder of biblical proportions. Fresh from his masterpiece in The Usual Suspects, Kevin Spacey gives another stellar performance in Seven -- and it's all packed into the final 15 minutes, since we never see him until his final confrontation with his pursuers. (Until finally handcuffed, he exhibits an almost supernatural prescience and ability to stay two steps ahead of New York's finest.) Playing the omnipotent avenger, Spacey is convinced that his life's work -- even God's work, as he calls it -- will yield so memorable a series of seven murders that he (and his captors) will be famous for decades. His first five murders are intensely disturbing in the morbid and self-righteous complexity and commitment required for their completion -- and he unwaveringly promises an encore! Does he deliver? Don't see Seven on a full stomach -- but see it! Seven delivers a tour-de-force script and performances all around. I own it on DVD. 5 stars.

The Great Santini (1979)

Robert Duvall played one of his most memorable roles in The Great Santini -- the nom de guerre of legendary fighter pilot Lt. Col. Bull Meechum, warrior of the skies, possessor of the Right Stuff, tough-as-nails, man's man and leader of men, center of attention, force of nature, life of the party -- the "Chow down, hogs!" scene is hilarious -- and totally emotionally incommunicado with himself, his wife, and his children. As he once more relocates his family, this time accepting a post at the Citadel in stately South Carolina, Blythe Danner is the gracious southern woman, military wife, and rock of the family; Michael O'Keefe is his son, turning 18 and coming into his own; and his daughter ("Sportsfan") is all but invisible to him. Duvall cannot accept the day his son first beats him at hoops, practicing through the night to hone his athletic edge. Moreover, as a warrior entering peacetime (during the JFK administration) and approaching retirement, Duvall has been so accustomed to living life "on the cutting edge" -- what happens if the sword ever slips? 4 stars.

The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008)

Really, just make a sci-fi movie better than the average Sci-Fi Channel fare and I'm relieved. Make it better than the War of the Worlds remake and I'm pleased. This remake of The Day the Earth Stood Still is better than some would have you believe. (I suppose it helps if you are a parent.) It is certainly better than the remake of The War of the Worlds for story and special effects but, more importantly, it involved me emotionally, even without comparing it to the original The Day the Earth Stood Still. In fact, I liked this remake quite a bit and would watch it again. (I picked it up as a redbox free Monday rental.) Yes, the plot was a little murky but it ambled along. This adaptation frequently reminded me of two favorite apocalyptic sci-fi novels from Greg Bear, The Forge of God for the extraterrestrial pronouncement of doom and Blood Music for the all-consuming nanocytes. It left me unclear about the big swirly balls of light: Were they weapons or arks for animal life (or a mix, since the one in Central Park remained)? The changes from the original movie esp. those involving Gort left more room for special effects and worked out in the end but made me wonder: Why make so many changes esp. since they left the exact mechanism and extent of Earth's imminent destruction somewhat cloudy (unless the cyberlocusts greatly multiplied and the swirly globes packed more oomph than they had let on)? I appreciated the human touches added to this version: Kathy Bates channeling Hillary Clinton channeling a gutsy Secretary of Defense, the Visitor's conversation in Chinese then English in the cafe, the Visitor's dialog with John Cleese, and Jennifer Connolly's emotional plea for humanity. Cleese, Connolly, and the Chinese gentleman (James Hong) all represented humanity well and I also appreciated the adoptive son (Jaden Smith), who did a yeoman's job in an unpretentious role surrounded by portentious adults. Keanu Reeves has turned his wooden countenance into a bankable asset whenever he plays the taciturn harbinger of doom. Similar to The Forge of God's "Ask important questions" scene, I don't view it as hamhanded for an unprepossessing alien Visitor threatening genocide to speak forthrightly: "No, it's not your planet. If Earth dies, you die. If you die, Earth lives. The decision has been made." Any crisis forms a crux of transformation. The Day the Earth Stood Still delivers. 4 stars.

Flyboys (2006)

Forget the airbrushed special effects and sanitized bluescreen computer graphics of Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow. Enjoy the down-and-dirty, seat-of-the-pants, sweat-of-the-brow, eat-lead-you-damn-Kraut! aerial dogfights in Flyboys, based on the story of the Lafayette Escadrille -- U.S. pilots who volunteered to serve as an air wing in France before America entered World War I. As the Fox-TV-loving detractors of France conveniently forget, America had no fighter pilots or air force, so we sent men to train and fly with the French. Flyboys shows the guff and bluster it took to train our boys up to fly like men who commanded the clouds -- when planes were still little better than biplanes -- and we couldn't have done it without the French. Don't see this movie for a complex love-story subplot as in Pearl Harbor or even historical accuracy as in Master and Commander. Watch Flyboys for its big, gritty, in-your-face, shooting-gallery action. It puts you right in the cockpit with the pilot as a German's twin guns walk perforating rivers of lead across his wing or fuselage, percussive impacts shearing off bits of shrapnel at best and threatening imminent explosive death at worst. Uncle Sam's boys (James Franco and company) fly up a storm but my favorite is their wily squadron leader, played by none other than your favorite Frenchman and mine, Jean Reno. 4 stars.

John Cleese's Wine for the Confused (2004)

I have enjoyed John Cleese's version of a layperson's approach to wine both times I have seen it. (Always my favorite Monty Python member, Cleese has also hosted an impressive documentary about the social and artistic importance of the human face.) Cleese takes a folksy approach to the frequently confusing world of wines, where (as in the art world) snobbery often reigns. He starts with a simple outdoor wine-tasting among a circle of friends (including the always affable Brendan Fraser) and talks them through finding simple words to describe the flavors they notice; words like "fruity" or "nutty" or "raspberry" are offered (if memory serves). He then uses this experience to begin encouraging his friends (and through them, his viewers) to use their own senses, rely and build on their own experiences, and trust their own judgment when deciding what kind of wines they like to drink. He visits a few vineyards, nibbles a few grapes, and dialogs with a few sommeliers (wine stewards) to provide a thoroughly enlightening introduction to wine and its enjoyment. He caps off the show by hosting a blind wine-tasting (again informal and outdoors) which entertainingly proves that one person's $15 wine is another person's $200 wine (and vice versa). The special features include additional insightful tips on wine enjoyment from Cleese, three discussions with a handful of winemakers, and Brendan Fraser's trenchant wine evaluations (such as "Put it back in the horse"). 4 stars.

Tron (1982)

Tron is the holy grail of early computer-animated movies. In the age after Pong on the Atari and predating even the Macintosh, mainframe-based color graphics and animation predominated in Tron but it had the semblance of a story that dovetailed with the characters and computer graphics. In this story, Jeff Bridges is a game programmer whose work is being stolen by the CEO of a megacorporation and its evil mainframe computer (David Warner as Dillinger and the MCP). Bridges has also developed a new technology that can digitize matter into data; turning it against him, the evil mainframe transports Bridges inside the virtual-reality world of its own datastores to pit him gladiator-style against his own games' champions. Bridges has courage though and is determined to surmount each challenge. Through their creator's "incarnation" and battle against totalitarian control, his digital creations show their devotion; the last words of one "program" is a reverent "O, my User!" Tron's most iconic scenes are the deadly lightcycle races and the final confrontation with the evil mainframe. Tron seems a bit dated by today's standards, certainly, but like Metropolis, it remains a seminal and impressive movie from its time. Spoofed in Family Guy so you know it's cool. 4.5 stars.

The Last Starfighter (1984)

The Last Starfighter's Alex Rogan (Lance Guest mirroring a young Tom Hanks) is the quintessential teen who's bored, bored, bored of his mundane earthly existence -- until he meets his lucky star. Alex not only lives in a "mobile home that never goes anywhere" but, rather than being able to go to the beach with his friends or go out with the girl of his dreams, his mother prevails on him to keep the trailer park in repair -- even as he murmurs sotto voce the same tedious daily palaver of the two retirees on the porch. One day, a truck delivers the vehicle of his salvation: a cool new arcade video machine called The Last Starfighter. Alex is exceptionally gifted at the game and soon earns what turns out to be the highest score -- in all of the galaxy. A signal is sent. In time, an emissary arrives in a Delorean-style spaceship: smooth-talking Alpha Centauri (Robert Preston in his last movie role) wants to recruit Alex as "the last starfighter" to save the galaxy from an insidious and advancing alien scourge. They have decimated all previous defenders and would be unstoppable but for one remaining Starfighter ship -- and Alex, if he will train and fly it. He agrees to go. He meets his amiable if reptilian copilot Grig (Dan O'Herlihy) and, through twists and turns, fulfills his destiny. This movie was groundbreaking since it had the first computer-generated graphics (20 minutes' worth as I recall and using no less than a Cray X-MP supercomputer). The Death Blossom battle was pretty suspenseful back in the day and the dialog is dated but still funny. See it for the nostalgia or as a fun family film. (The PG rating is for the little brother's language.) 4 stars.

Innerspace (1987)

I enjoyed Innerspace immensely when it came out in the late 1980s. (Ah, the Eighties... Good times...) Martin Short plays Jack Putter, an overlooked nebbish -- his boss actually calls him a putz -- who becomes the unwitting host/partner to Dennis Quaid's Lt. Tuck Pendleton, a macho test pilot who has been miniaturized with his ship for what will be a Fantastic Voyage-style test run before he is accidentally injected into Jack's (um, if memory serves) left buttock. The ice queen saboteur (Fiona Lewis in her last role as Dr. Margaret Canker) and her cyborg agent (bit-part actor Vernon Wells as Mr. Igoe) make for cryptic and comic villains that still give me whoops of laughter. (He comes with detachable finger accessories that will slice, dice, spray, or frappe and she seems to have a thing for or with him!) The most hilarious scene is the tandem dance to "Twistin' the Night Away" before Jack and Tuck hold a strategy powwow. Jack also pines for Tuck's girl (Meg Ryan as Lydia Maxwell) and, in the muddle, gets to go places no man has been before. Innerspace is a hoot of a camp comedy that I can highly recommend esp. if you like men with Han Solo haircuts and girls with glam-rock hairstyles. See it if you liked Fantastic Voyage and loved Short Circuit! Rated PG for language, drinking, implied adult situations and Tuck's buck-naked caboose. Rated PG for language, drinking, implied adult situations and Tuck's buck-naked caboose. 4.5 stars.

The Matrix Revolutions (2003)

My personal threshhold of laughability *for a sci-fi movie not the novel* starts below Starship Troopers. Well, The Matrix Revolutions is much closer to The Matrix than Starship Troopers. Truthfully, I'd like to see a breakdown of people who hated The Matrix Revolutions to see if science-fiction fanboys are few and video-game fanboys are many. Science fiction is the literature and cinema of ideas and convergences: What would happen if...? The willing suspension of disbelief perhaps comes easier to those trained in the skill, which might be like bending spoons. (Big hint from the first two movies: Possibly "there is no spoon" outside of your mind.) All that said, this third movie in The Matrix series remains gripping and well above average. I don't understand how people complain that Keanu Reeves is too wooden an actor to play even a cyberworld messiah then complain when he convincingly (for him and his role) portrays love and fear. What do they want, Benicio del Toro? It seems the haters want Revolutions to be all one thing or another -- just like the first movie, more like the second, more imaginary world, less real world, more action, less talk, fewer battles, bigger fights. (You can't get bigger fights than what we got, if you follow the laws of physics.) You can see how it gets confounding. Better to see Revolutions as it is -- the action-oriented resolution to an intellectual science-fiction trilogy. The philosophical questions are always pivotal to how Neo finds and fulfills his mission of bringing peace to Zion and freedom to willing minds in the Matrix. Consider carefully how the Oracle is concerned with looking forward and making free choices while the Merovingian is concerned with looking backward and rationalizing determinism -- even though he controls the train between the Matrix and the real world -- while the Architect is a construct of the machine world and is constrained with balancing equations. Neo and Trinity negate nihilism and deny determinism by choosing love. Free choice -- and belief more than knowledge -- is what gets us there (as the Oracle sums up at the end). The Matrix Revolutions is the darkest and grittiest of the three Matrix movies because it focuses not on the polished virtual world of the Matrix but on "the real world" inhabited by free humans on the verge of extermination, "the machine world" that's waging a war of attrition against humanity, and a devolving Matrix where Agent Smith has become quite the megalomaniac. Zion's mechagunners are cool but Neo rightly intuits that diplomacy is the path to peace; war has been considered the inevitable path to humanity's annihilation while the truth would be even more apocalyptic. (To add a moral to the Architect's monologue in Reloaded, those who fail to learn from the mistakes of history are condemned to repeat them. So if you can't see the Matrix through Neo's inner eyes, at least read Wikipedia for a clue before you choose to complain about Revolutions.) 4 stars.

The Edge (1997)

Anthony Hopkins plays the well-suited if understated role of a publishing magnate who is rich but humble (Charles). Alec Baldwin plays the well-suited role of a crass and self-serving photographer (Bob) who has been cuckolding Charles' younger wife. Bob needles Charles about owning a plane and being too old for a young wife but Charles responds graciously, even with intellectual detachment, offering up knowledge and reflections from a lifetime of reading books. After the plane crash-lands in Alaska, the two men find themselves stranded in the wilderness and being hunted by a humungous and ferocious grizzly bear. Charles is both strategist and tactician, coaxing the more macho Bob in how to be fearless and survive: "I'm going to kill the bear! Say it!" The scene where they finally face the bear down is iconic and famous for the naked adrenaline it can inspire (vicariously) in viewers. Bob's aggression springs forth later in other ways and we are left to wonder who has the upper hand on who. In the climax and conclusion, Charles reminds me of both a magnanimous Spencer Tracy and his own chief-executive role in Meet Joe Black. Why? "Because the rabbit is smarter than the panther." I own this one. It's full of great lines! 5 stars.

Meet Joe Black (1998)

I always enjoy watching this update of Death Takes A Holiday because Anthony Hopkins ably plays a successful if world-weary CEO who puts his family ahead of his corporation. When the spirit of Death comes to claim the soul of William Parrish, Bill responds with a proposition: If Death will give him a few more days to spend with his loved ones and arrange his affairs, he will personally introduce Death to "the ropes" -- the joys and pleasures -- of human life. Death accepts and takes a convenient body (Brad Pitt) and name (Joe Black). Death is supernaturally savvy about timeless things but being corporeal and carnal is new and heady stuff. Soon he's enjoying sumptuous meals and eyeing Hopkins' daughter (Claire Forlani). Hopkins must keep Joe's secret but he keeps no secrets from Joe, whom he introduces to his business partners as his trusted "associate," so naturally they wonder what the hell is going on with his estate planning. Meanwhile, Hopkins warns his daughter away from Joe ("He's no good for you"), but she persists in pursuing his hunkiness. FYI the romance is not conventional because neither is Joe Black. The previously stoic Death begins enjoying himself, believing he can act with impunity; Hopkins realizes he must tread very carefully to preserve his legacy. In the end, this otherworldly meeting of one mortal man with (not just his own but capital-M) mortality and Joe's creepy disingenuousness make Meet Joe Black work well for me. In addition, the script is quite literate and the cinematography is sumptuous as is the soundtrack. It is one of the great movies and will remain a timeless classic. I hope you like it just as much too (though if you can't reflect on your inner emotional landscape for 3 hours then please watch something else). I had to own this one. 5 stars.

The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai (1984)

The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai was a flash in the pan during its theater run but has since developed a devoted cult following on videotape and DVD. This movie (BB to fans) is hard to summarize -- esp. since nearly every scene and line of dialog implies a deeper backstory -- and feels like a modern-day Flash Gordon serial. Peter Weller is the fabled Buckaroo Banzai, a Japanese-American Renaissance man: He's a world-renowned physicist, neurosurgeon, rock star, and presidential advisor. As our story begins, he has just driven his experimental jetcar through the time/space continuum -- and a mountain -- discovering something alien in the process. Then it's off to perform brain surgery with Jeff Goldblum ("No, no, don't tug on that -- you don't know what it's attached to"), who as New Jersey (in red-and-white Roy Rogers togs) is also auditioning for a spot in his band, BB and the Hong Kong Cavaliers. Then it's off in the band bus to perform a rock gig at Artie's -- enforcing the peace and discovering someone who seems familiar (Ellen Barkin as Penny Priddy). Finally, the alien invasion plot comes to light -- you'll love it! John Lithgow is over-the-top as Prof. Emilio Lizardo, aka Lord Whorfin ("Laugh-a while you can, monkey-boy!"), as is his pompous chief minion, Christopher Lloyd as John Bigbooty ("Big-boo-TAY!"). The musicians in the band (Reno, Rawhide, and Perfect Tommy) are also scientists in Buckaroo's compound, where he gathers terrestrial and alien intelligence and conferences with the President in the war room before going out to personally do battle in an airship. That's the broad outline without giving away anything substantive but let's not forget Billy Vera as Pinky Carruthers and Damon Hines as Scooter Lindley, Blue Blazer Irregulars who capture the Secretary of Defense in the hornet's nest at Yoyodyne Propulsion Systems (a name lifted from Thomas Pynchon's novel The Crying of Lot 49). Be sure not to miss the closing credits and extremely catchy theme tune! BB appeared 20 years after the Get Smart TV series and 12 years before Mars Attacks! but you will likely become a huge fan of BB if you enjoyed those puppies since they share many affinities. So don't forget: "Character is what you are in the dark" (intentionally retro) and "Wherever you go, there you are!" (just nonsense). 4 stars. (4-9-09 posted 4-29-09)

The Matrix: Reloaded (2003)

What exactly is the problem with all the snarky naysayers when it comes to The Matrix: Reloaded? What a fickle gaggle of ingrates! First the Wachowski Bros. make an absolutely revolutionary movie in The Matrix. Suddenly the sequel's rival surfeit of adrenaline-pumping fight and action scenes is somehow "boring"? So Neo, Morpheus, and Trinity continue their mission (to boldly kick ass where no one has gone before) and lead the last surviving human colony (with many new and interesting characters) towards revolution and a doubtful outcome -- how exactly is this "boring"? After numerous viewings, I still find Reloaded to be mesmerizing. Yes, the plot in Reloaded feels looser than in The Matrix, but I think that's because it's complex rather than nonexistent. Actually, I think the rub lies in that Reloaded fleshes out the intellectual underpinnings of The Matrix: More than perhaps any other, Reloaded is the thinking person's science fiction movie -- and for too many people, having to think is "boring" (or laughable). To enjoy this movie, you need the chops to pay as close attention to the dialog as to the kung fu. The Merovingian tips the hand by asserting that "choice is an illusion" but the Architect is no joke: Everything he says is pure, sweet exposition and makes complete sense. (Unfortunately, nihilism doesn't contribute much to Neo's strategy against the machines -- which is also doubtless a part of their strategy -- so instead he chooses to save what is truly human: Love.) Please pay attention to the age-appropriate notes for children to the left, since the wild rumpus in Zion is quite sensual in a tribal sense and Neo's lovemaking with Trinity is quite sensual in a carnal sense. Oh yah, the sequel's soundtrack is equally awesome. The Matrix: Reloaded -- come for the fight scenes, stay for the philosophy! 4.5 stars.

Jurassic Park III (2001)

I chose to own all three Jurassic Park movies because -- this is Jurassic C-G-I Park with a dinosaur tail on it, yo, and I have a son who loved dinosaurs. Since then, nightmares have replaced some of the love, but these films are classics and he'll enjoy them again someday -- after therapy or maybe another 5 years? Anyway, The Lost World novel had a few narrative threads yet to mine for a third movie, so the makers went back to trying to devise an even bigger (and hence scarier) dinosaur -- even if they somehow forgot to put the actors (and hence us) in even more scarier situations. Sure, a spinosaurus treads scenery a few times and mixes it up with a T-Rex -- and a couple other known dinosaur species are encountered -- but these are merely episodic excursions instead of what could have been dire mortal peril as in the first movie's sustained T-Rex and velociraptor attacks. A few bursts of epinephrine but no adrenaline-spawned pools of flop sweat. At least they got back Sam Neill for one last oh-God-not-dinos-again hurrah. William H. Macy is always great; Tea Leoni was passable. The mercenaries just made for quick dinofodder. (Way to add that sickening bone crunch to every chomp. Yick! How perfunctory yet declasse as scripted deaths go -- did the dinos get a check-em-off shopping list?) The ending is fairly weak. If I had to try and come up with the best scene in the movie, it would take a while but I think I'd pick the dream scene on the plane -- and that says something about the rest of the movie, doesn't it? 3.5 stars.

The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997)

I had to own all three Jurassic Park movies: Dinosaurs, dinosaurs, dinosaurs. The second and the third movies are each progressively weaker than the preceding film -- probably because each strived to present a bigger dinosaur more than to perpetuate the first movie's visceral thrill or even to extend that foreboding sense of "Aiiieeee--!" *GULP!* (Selling the gristle not the sizzle.) Actually I liked the second film just fine; it had a lot of the Jurassic Park spirit, just in a different way. Jeffrey Goldblum is always superb, here as the persecuted whistleblower: "There are no versions of the truth" and "Sure, that's how it starts: The oohing and the aahing. But later, there's the running and the screaming..." Richard Attenborough (God rest his cinematic and his eternal soul) has come around and wants to redeem his sins by mounting an emergency expedition to save the dinos' legacy. Can the Earth lovers -- or the thunder lizards -- defeat the corporate pirates? Julianne Moore has gone rushing in where mortals fear to tread. At least Pete Postlethwaite wisely quits while he's ahead -- before the nocturnal stampede. Don't drink the crimson creekwater! And that's just the first half of the movie before things really run aground and the T-Rex goes rushing in where mortals -- scream. "Cleanup in aisle 3." How high a body count can a body count? The Lost World: Jurassic Park 2 -- come for the menace and stay for the mayhem. It's always a thrill to watch. The John Williams musical score remains, of course, unforgettable. 4.5 stars.

Jurassic Park (1993)

By dint of its script by the late science fiction novelist Michael Crichton, blockbuster computer graphics by George Lucas's Industrial Light & Magic, and movie direction by Steven Spielberg, Jurassic Park still remains the greatest dinosaur movie ever made. It's funny, it's scary, it's iconic, and it's not yet been matched (though Peter Jackson's King Kong tried for a fraction of its 3-hour runtime). Never before had we seen a T-Rex or velociraptor in all its jaw-dropping (and jaw-crunching) infamy. Plus the late Stan Winston's gutteral, amped-out dino roars made us pee our pants clear to next Tuesday's wash. Only in Jurassic Park can you ... SEE world-famous paleontologists (Sam Neill and Laura Dern) use sonar technology to assist their fossil digs as Sam's character sadistically lectures a toothsome preteen on the smorgasbord tactics of the velociraptor. HEAR rockstar mathematician (Jeff Goldblum) lecture the jaded capitalist (the late Richard Attenborough) on his doomed approach to genetic engineering and, incidentally, theme-park development. WINCE at the capitalist's oft-repeated mantra "Spared no expense!" SHIVER as your heart drops to the pit of your gullet just before you read the words "Objects in this mirror are larger than they appear" or (if you are an attorney) your torso drops to the pit of a T-Rex gullet! SMIRK as the beefy programmer (Wayne Knight) tells the dilophosaurus "I have nothing on me. I have no food on me!" The fear is palpable -- oh yeah, the flop sweat is running down the small of your back, but that's not flop sweat running down your leg. Jurassic Park -- proudly serving up nightmares for 16 years now. Watch it again and say it with me: "Where's the goat...?" 5 stars.

The Abyss (1989)

The Abyss is one of the best sci-fi movies I have seen -- and always it plucks at my heartstrings. (You don't find science and emotion paired together well very often in science fiction so that's something in itself. Besides, James Cameron was clearly the guy to make a sci-fi movie set completely in a subsea drilling platform and submersibles.) I own the video and the novel -- which is excellent, by the way, since Cameron picked master of characterization Orson Scott Card to further flesh out the inner motivations of Lindsay the rig designer and Bud the crew foreman (not to mention the inscrutable actions of the Builders). It would give too much away to say more about the love/hate relationship between Ed Burns and Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio but their cold side always entertains while their warm side never fails to melt me (esp. Bud's farewell and the effect it has on his people as well as a matter of extraterrestrial import). Bud's epiphany makes for a thrilling climax and denouement, of course. The only thing I don't like in this movie is the ham-handed acting of the lead Navy SEAL (Michael Biehn) -- though you have to respect his tenacity. The rest of the ensemble cast does well in their respective roles, every one. What makes The Abyss so iconic and memorable though is its sense of wonder and discovery. The musical score beautifully conveys that spirit of the explorer which The Abyss posits to reside at the core of our very human nature. 5 stars.

The Matrix (1999)

The Matrix defines "awesome" so it was the perfect movie to inaugurate my DVD system (back in the day). Even compared to Brazil and Naked Lunch, The Matrix is arguably the greatest cyberpunk movie ever and, to my mind, the greatest science-fiction movie to date. It has a powerhouse story (no pun intended), martial-arts beatdowns, shoot-em-up arsenals, and an arsenal of cutting-edge special effects. It features a complex and intelligent narrative with embedded clues and convoluted exposition. Many who have seen The Matrix tell me it similarly blew them away. Our story begins with "Mr. Anderson," a corporate programmer by day and a hacker by night. Neo has spent years of sleepless nights searching the cybernets for the identity of the mysterious Morpheus and the secrets behind The Matrix. He follows several omniscient clues to a rave where he meets Trinity, a notorious hacker who can show him the way -- but then Agents come to arrest him on suspicion of conspiracy (not that they need a reason to go all police-state on anyone). From here, Neo's narrative becomes worse than a Kafkaesque nightmare -- and only Morpheus can show him "how far down the rabbit hole goes." It turns out the world is not as it seems and Morpheus believes Neo has a messianic destiny. As to how it all plays out, I can say no more. This movie has so many great scenes and lines. Like Ahnuld was perfect for the Terminator, Keanu Reeves is apt for the moodily trenchant, trenchcoat-wearing Neo. Laurence Fishburne will be best known as Neo's trainer and true believer, Morpheus. Carrie-Anne Moss is a standout, a knockout, and a kickass as Trinity. All the supporting roles are excellent: Tank, Dozer, Mouse, Switch, and esp. Joe Pantaliano as the slimy Cipher. Hugo Weaving is exceptional as Agent Smith and Gloria Foster is inimitable as the cryptic Oracle. Be sure to see The Matrix if you like Jet Li, Sam Peckinpah, and The Godfather. In return, you'll see groundbreaking martial-arts scenes, including the Wachowski Brothers' 360-degree panoramic and "bullet-time" scenes that instantly proved to be so culturally iconic as well as the biggest wirework martial-arts shoot-em-up scene ever filmed. More than action piled on action, however, it's the impact of the story behind The Matrix that makes it weighty and memorable. True, it's only science fiction, but if you suspect that truth can eventually become stranger than fiction, then more so than with The Terminator or Jurassic Park, you may never look at the real world in the same way again. 5 stars.

Runaway Bride (1999)

I was reasonably impressed with the middle-of-the-road romantic comedy Runaway Bride because, in addition to mainly allowing Richard Gere to beam beatifically at the beautiful if frantic Julia Roberts, there was a seed of a motive to the story. Gere is a columnist who hears about a woman who has approached the marriage altar with three men and every time fled in a panic, refusing to wed each prospective groom before it ever came to saying "I do." So he makes a snarky comment in print -- and she writes to gently chide, "How can you say that? You don't even know me." He decides to travel and meet her, then write a column about the real woman. Being Gere and Roberts, yes, they are going to have to fall in love -- wouldn't you think? -- but what was most interesting to me (though maybe not to everyone) is how patiently he helps her identify and face her fears. (I love the triumphant scene where she's nailed it on the head and is attacking it with gusto.) As for the ending, if she's given one more chance at the altar -- will she run? It was a suspenseful and enjoyable ending. The movie's closing credits are hilarious because of the Dixie Chicks' music video of the rollicking song "Ready to Run" in which they play three hightailing brides. 3.5 stars.

Frost/Nixon (2008)

Some may pooh-pooh Ron Howard but he did his homework for Apollo 13 so well that now everyone thinks Jim Lovell's famous words were "Houston, we have a problem." (Howard recast the line slightly for dramatic effect but aced a shipload of technical details for accuracy.) Along similar lines, Frost/Nixon well deserves its Oscar nomination, since the Nixonian era is recreated almost as faithfully as an episode of Mad Men in this drama-as-documentary. While I could often hear the smooth undertones of Frank Langella's trademark purr, he expertly channeled Nixon's jowly growl and his tortured psyche for the duration. Not a whit of Tricky Dick caricatures here, only his humanity -- abhorrent at times but ultimately tragic (if self-inflicted and incapable of repentence). The close facial studies in this movie are refulgent in their revelations but what kept me on the edge of my seat was the banter -- not merely banter, of course, but the jabs and counterjabs of a bantamweight (Frost) against a welterweight (Nixon). Make no mistake, this movie is an intellectual boxing match with bobbing, weaving, and feinting as real as any physical contest. Nixon's power-hungry inner Machiavelli counted coup early on David Frost's media playboy persona, outmatching him and seizing the upper hand for three of the four taping sessions. Only when Michael Sheen as Frost sets aside his baseless optimism to take the bull by the horns does he wrest the history-making confession from Nixon that the country sought. (Would that Bush and Cheney remembered that just because the President does or asserts something illegal does *not* make it legal.) Sam Rockwell, Toby Jones, and Oliver Platt as Frost's prep team slip into their supporting roles in a fashion that feels iconically familiar and Kevin Bacon is excellent as Nixon's uptight chief of staff. Frost/Nixon feels like we're watching history in the making. Whether you lived through the Watergate scandal or want an emotionally fulfilling history lesson on its latter-day milestones, Frost/Nixon presents America with a timeless chapter in our recent past that should never be repeated again. The deleted scenes are interesting but I'm pleased they were deleted. 4.5 stars.

Gregorian Chant: Songs of the Spirit (1995)

This disc (currently available for viewing online) makes a worthwhile introduction to Gregorian chant for newcomers as well as a beautiful audiovisual album for aficionados to watch and listen. The music is rich, textured, and inspiring. A slide show of beautiful church and monastery scenes (architectural as well as decorative) dating back to the 1200s lends visual anchors to the aural flow. Between pieces, de la Cuesta offers several explanatory sentences about the art form and his lifelong appreciation for chant. He closes by citing chant's spiritual and emotional power, which I for one found evident throughout the lay and monastic choirs' selections but esp. in the final piece. The words may blur together unless you know Latin but I suspect this disc can imbue relaxation and peace anytime you are prepared to listen. 3.5 stars.

Earth (2007)

Disneynature's Earth, at $40 million the most expensive documentary ever made, opened in the theaters on Earth Day 2009 with record revenues (for a documentary) of $4 million. Although I wasn't aware when I saw it last night that this 1.5-hour movie is a compilation from the astounding 11-hour Discovery/BBC series Planet Earth, I remain extremely satisfied with my viewing experience. Earth is a reimagined and integral whole that will continue to have massive appeal to families and nature lovers. Make no mistake: The high-definition cinematography is jaw-droppingly gorgeous. This valentine to Earth will make you fall in love with our planet (if you weren't already). Time-lapse photography is used occasionally to beautiful effect (even when showing slime mold growth in the tundra). The aerial photography is thrilling and the night-vision photography of an elephant/lion smackdown is impressive. James Earl Jones as narrator lends his stentorious tones to a script that (being Disney) threads a "family" theme throughout -- even though the fathers are absent in the scenes that develop the stories of a polar bear and her cubs, an elephant and her calf, and a humpback whale and her calf. (The polar bear father forms a separate narrative since -- as Jones intones, "he isn't going to be much help" in hunting for survival -- male polar bears are solitary and fend for themselves.) Earth has gentle humor (esp. polar bear cubs navigating a slope and bird-of-paradise mating dances) but also implied death. (Three animals are seen being brought down in slow motion, other animals are attacked but escape, and two animals are left in mortal condition. No one gets the coup-de-grace on camera though.) In summary, the family theme helps anthropomorphize and focus the narrative for kiddos but I wouldn't advise letting children age 5 and under witness the "circle of life" scenes in the tundra, desert, and ocean. Discounted a half-star for being "too cute" to 4.5 stars.

The Fly (1958)

While I like Jeff Goldblum in anything the man does, including his remake of this film, the original version of The Fly is no slouch for a classic movie. Vincent Price bookends this story as the affable brother of Andre Delambre (David Hedison), a brilliant independent scientist with a boatload of electronic gear and a mainframe computer in his basement annex. (Both independently wealthy men bankroll the laboratory.) Basically Cary Grant with a brain and a science fetish, Andre has applied himself to making several utopian breakthroughs (mentioned rapidly by his wife in a quiz about his current project) with no success. This time, however, he has achieved the ultimate boon to mankind (as he aptly explains its potential): a matter-to-matter teleportation device. It still has a few bugs (no pun intended) he needs to work out. His bioethics are suspect when it comes to testing living beings though -- and he personally pays the ultimate price. Costume effects include a fly head and claw, for the most part hidden from his wife as he lurks in his laboratory (although, sure, she eventually pulls off his hood and screams). Special effects include (naturally) lots of blinky lights on the computer and a spinning tape drive (oooh! technical!) plus a bank of colorful neon-tube lights (huh?) before the glass-walled teleportation cabinet glows blue then flashes an intense yellow. Audio effects are as completely consistent as the special effects, ending with a loud zapping sound. The Fly is no slouch as a classic sci-fi movie. What I enjoy about classic movies is their social dynamic seen in conversation and etiquette. His wife Helene (Patricia Owens) is a blonde vision in pearls, loving and supportive of her husband yet vapidly disaffected too. (Her flatness of affect and state of denial are understandable given what has transpired though it comes with the telltale whiff of chauvinism: The men around her decide her fate and betray her to get the truth. Even her more-earnest-than-Opie son comments, "You know how [temperamental] women can be.") Because of what is at stake, she has been nearly obsessive in her search for a single fly -- which no one sees until the end: "Help me-e-e!" Yes, the acting is just more than acceptable but The Fly is a memorable classic sci-fi detective movie. 3.5 stars. (4-10-09 posted 4-22-09)

The Game (1997)

The Game is a tangled nest of plot twists that made for a rollicking roller-coaster ride the first time I saw it and a riveting reliving of the thrills the second time. And I'll gladly watch it again. Wealthy financier Nicholas Van Orton (Michael Douglas) gets a visit from his estranged black-sheep brother Conrad (Sean Penn) on his birthday but the pair again parts with bitter words. Suddenly, Nicholas is caught up in a shadowy, convoluted web known only as "the Game" where reality proves unreal and no one can be trusted. (One scene is reminiscent of Dustin Hoffman's escape in Marathon Man.) And what about the mysterious woman named Christine (Deborah Kara Unger)? In any event, Nicholas is on the run for his life right up to the moment he crashes through a fresh perspective. Does he live? Does he get the girl? No one can tell you who or what "the Game" is; you have to experience it (and survive) to find out. 5 stars.

U Turn (1997)

U Turn is one of my most favorite movies, largely because of Billy Bob Thornton's quirky role as a scuzzball car mechanic. (Talk about grea-sy!) Sean Penn is a frustrated loner who cannot escape a seedy backwater burg for anything. Witnessing his trials is a wicked pleasure, but Billy Bob puts a sadistic glee into his misery. No, Sean, don't get uppity or make him mad -- your sweet ride wouldn't like him when he's mad. Just watch your back (and your wallet) -- or best yet, start walking. Try to put as many miles between you and the hayseed hamlet where your car broke down. Trust no one -- after all, no one trusts you! And stop ogling that hot dish played by J-Lo -- or you'll be sorry! Run, fool! Or stay -- so we can feel your pain. Misery loves company, right? Pass the popcorn. 5 stars.

A Knight's Tale (2001)

After I saw A Knight's Tale on the big screen with an English professor friend, I decided to own my own copy so I could watch it at will. I've introduced my youngest son to the movie and he loves it too. It served as my introduction to Heath Ledger, who plays William Thatcher, a knight's apprentice who finds himself unemployed -- so he decides to begin a "free lance" career of his own on the jousting circuits. His knight-errant companions, the Sancho-Panza-esque Roland (Marki Addy) and quirky Wat (Alan Tudyk), remind him that "only landed gentry with patents of nobility may compete" but Will tells them, "I won't remain nothing. A man can change his stars." Along comes the irascible if not-yet-famous Geoffrey Chaucer (Paul Bettany) -- fairly comfortable in his own skin, as you might say -- and the four enterprising young men have a team. Much of the movie's entertainment comes from the anachronistic blending of music by Queen and David Bowie in a medieval setting. It's just a hoot to see peasants reveling at a jousting tourney like so many Green Bay Packer fans to the tune of "We Will Rock You" as Geoff introduces Will like a wrestling promoter: "I give to you, the seeker of serenity, the protector of Italian virginity, the enforcer of our Lord God, the one, the only, Sir Ul-l-lrich von Lichtenstein!" Will also spies and gives his heart to a beautiful lady (Shannyn Sossamon), who doesn't make things easy for him. Their romance is endearing and hilarious. Nor should we forget Prince Adhemar (Rufus Sewell), Will's daunting (and denting) nemesis on and off the jousting fields. A double-twist and soaringly satisfactory ending wrap up this thoroughly entertaining romp. 5 stars.

Transporter 2 (2005)

Jason Statham's clearly impressive fight moves -- and physique, when his shirt gets torn off, as it always does -- are again in superb evidence in Transporter 2. His biggest fight scene in the first Transporter movie was in a car garage where, in his use-whatever-is-at-hand style of martial arts, he lubed up his entire body then chock-walked on bicycle-pedal clips to gain the upper hand in footing and fighting. In Transporter 2, again in a garage, he famously wields a fire hose to take down more than a dozen bad guys. Yes, his fight scenes are choreographed but the best part is usually when he fights in close quarters and uses a shirt, jacket, post, or forearms as pinions of leverage against his opponent's own body. It's like a ballet of hurt. Jason is the Aussie answer to Jackie Chan -- less crane style, more big guns (fists and firearms). Jason as the taciturn Frank Martin takes on more opponents at one time but his premise remains the same: He is the consummate professional who will outdrive, outfight, and outpursue the baddest bad guys in order to save the life of the innocent -- in this case, the sweet son of a banking executive (Matthew Modine) who has been targeted for death by an arms dealer with a weaponized deadly serum. The oily arms dealer (Alessandro Gassman) keeps a sexy Shiva named Lola (Kate Nauta) who loves bustiers and slash-and-burn firefights; she's the best bad girl since Xenia Onatopp (Famke Janssen) tried to (get on and) off James Bond (Pierce Brosnan). In a mild comic touchstone not unlike Dennis Miller's role in 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Inspector Tarconi (François Berléand) reappears as a laconic French detective, with vacation plans that fizzle. Frank's friendship with the sardonic Frenchie shows a gentle philosophical side to male bonding that comes from world-weariness while possessing competence and an inner confidence. Frank's relationship with his pint-sized charge is also very special since he invests his full attention and affection in the boy; their riddle games are esp. poignant as is Frank's vigilance and protectiveness. Tight fights, tight editing, average scripting, and acceptable acting: Transporter 2 is as good as Transporter -- not to mention Mr. and Mrs. Smith or Shooting Aces -- and I like it even better. Yes, it's over-the-top with stunts and testosterone like Die Hard Live Free; what's wrong with that? Pass the popcorn and enjoy! 4.5 stars.

The Eruption of Mount St. Helens: IMAX (1980)

The Eruption of Mount St. Helens was my favorite IMAX film when it came out and for the 20 years following. (It could still be so but it's time to screen it again and compare it with others I've seen in the third decade. By the way, the best venue on which to see any IMAX movie is the 360-degree hemispherical Omnitheater at the Science Museum of Minnesota in downtown St. Paul.) The live footage of the mountain's liquefaction, collapse, and catastrophic explosion is unparalleled in the annals of science documentaries. The angry mile-high pillar of ash is as unforgettable as the Northwest's black pall was eerie. Though snow plows cleared most of the ash mounds that covered the highways and fouled car engines, I visited the region one year later to still see hillocks of ash everywhere. I personally surveyed the deforestation from a twin-engine tour plane and found it to be just as in this movie: Hundreds of square miles of flattened trees, all pointing away the source of the hellish destruction that took the lives of Harry Truman, David Johnston, and others. This documentary clearly and thoughtfully conveys the vast devastation that gives one pause to humbly consider the immense energies contained within our common creche, our planet Earth. 5 stars.

Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (1997)

To try to convince you of how rancid this movie is, let me describe just one five-minute segment. Let's say you're channel-surfing and you fall upon the story at this point: The sky opens up in a vast upside-down maelstrom (that looks like it was drawn using the Children's Finger Paint Edition of Lightwave special-effects software) except instead of sucking things into its well or funnel (going up), this celestial whirlpool serves as a portal to deliver several jet-propelled agents of evil (coming down). Next, a Power Rangers lookalike (though with dreadlocks of conduit) ominously enters the laboratory where Sonya is trying to free Jax from the shackles of a slab where he has been the cybernetically modified to "four times the usual strength." Jax decides to "see what these things can do" and uses his silvery biceps to rip off his own shackles. (How unforesightful of his evil-scientist overseers.) "Now that's what I'm talking about!" he exclaims -- just as Mr. Roboto unleashes several detonation charges in their general vicinity. Huge fireballs ensue. (Naturally, they duck, run, and therefore live.) Several martial-arts enemies appear to confront Sonya; Jax says he'll take on the robot. Several minutes of hee-yah! hee-yah! kickboxing ensue with bodies being flung against walls dozens of times. Eventually, the bad guys are vanquished (the last one by Sonya, no I am not making this up, hitting him over the head with a metal bowl) but Robodroid unleashes a farewell valentine for the fighting duo. (Naturally, they run, dive, and therefore live.) The scene shifts to the dark (and doubtless fetid) war council, where the general and his adjutants snarl and cast imprecations on each other, vying for superiority. (What is it with evil overlords and their fixation on grandstanding?) The dark lord strides in with a giant black mallet, mouths inane dialog then swings it to (literally) fire his general, then growls for a replacement. Three of the four adjutants snarl (one gnashing his teeth so hard you wonder about his medical bills for TMJ) and cast imprecations on each other, vowing their loyalty as they vie for superiority. The dark lord says "No! You are all too impetuous!" and picks as his new general the fourth -- she of impeccable makeup and silent leer, who has never said a word -- then storms out. This is when you make your exit too. 1 star.

The Hobbit (1978)

To every serious (if not merely sincere) lover of J.R.R. Tolkien's writings, the Rankin-Bass animated production of The Hobbit is a cringe-inducing travesty. Curiously enough, however, and particularly while bearing in mind the production's offenses to Tolkien's literary legacy, the Rankin-Bass name carries with it a certain popularity and the studio's animation style, while maudlin, has gained a certain iconic status. (Like it or not, the H.R. Pufnstuf look for Bilbo Baggins has become part of the cinematic legacy. Sigh.) Now if something could just be done about the dippy musical numbers! (Oh well, it could be worse: They could have used Leonard Nimoy singing "Bilbo Baggins.") See this one if you are a Tolkien completist and have thick skin -- lest you screech at the liberties taken by the script -- or if you have no awareness of Tolkien's bestselling children's book and simply want to give your family a fresh look at a cute story about hobbits and dwarves heading off to steal (back) a dragon's treasure. Enjoy! 2.5 stars.

Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)

Dr. Strangelove runs neck-and-neck with Network as the most incisive satire on modern society that I've yet seen. Network critiques the anything-goes voyeurism encouraged by our mass-media culture while Dr. Strangelove satirizes the military-industrial complex and esp. the insanity that lurks behind nuclear weapons. An incredibly lean, tight, and understated seriocomedy, Dr. Strangelove opens in the offices of Brig. Gen. Jack (D.!) Ripper (Sterling Hayden), who has just taken the liberty of locking down Burpelson AFB after commanding the strategic wing to attack the Soviet Union in a nuclear first strike. (He's nursed one too many anti-Communist conspiracy theories and finally snapped.) Peter Sellers plays three masterful roles in this movie: R.A.F. exchange officer Lionel Mandrake (Ripper's effete British second-in-command) as well as U.S. President Merkin Muffley and his creepy national security adviser Dr. Strangelove. Ripper has sprung a complex trap that will take the President, with all his advisors, to (if not over) the brink of nuclear Armageddon. George C. Scott plays the testosterone-soaked Gen. Buck Turgidson, who at one point begins capering and cackling, all gung-ho and golliwog over America's undeniable military prowess -- until he realizes that hundreds of millions of lives are on a matchpoint and everyone else in the war room happens to be aghast. Hayden and Scott are dead-to-rights perfect in their roles. I hadn't seen this movie since grad school but it amazes me how many of Muffley's presidential lines remained memorable and classic (from "Listen, Dimitri--" to "I'm just as sorry as you are, Dimitri! We're both sorry!" to the unforgettable "Gentlemen, this is the war room -- you can't fight in here!") Also a gem is Mandrake's stiff-upper-lip kid-glove treatment of Ripper but Sellers' ultimate coup is Strangelove as the Teutonic tutor to the ruling class -- esp. as his black-gloved right hand repeatedly takes the cigarette away from or has to get smacked down by the left hand, spasmodically salutes to an ejaculatory "Mein Fuhrer!" and morbidly tries to throttle its owner as he speaks. The military logistics are as realistic as a Tom Clancy novel right up until Slim Pickens, a-whoopin' and a-hollerin', completes his mission. Every role in this movie feels measured to perfection. This one should be on everyone's must-see list. 5 stars.