VeggieTales: Esther, the Girl Who Became Queen (2000)

My favorite VeggieTales episode is hereby Esther, the Girl Who Became Queen. It's a standalone Bible story told in the VeggieTales style -- using vegetable-based characters and cornball humor -- but mercifully no VeggieTales schtick. (No Larry the Tomato, Silly Songs, etc.) You get the orthodox narrative from the book of Esther -- the king of Persia's righthand man, Haman, has it in for Esther's relative, Mordecai, a Jew -- acted out in unorthodox fashion by a zucchini as king, peas as would-be assassins, Mordecai as a grape, etc. In a word, Haman plans to banish all Jews to the Island of Perpetual Tickling unless the new queen Esther can convince the king otherwise. (The VeggieTales ethos is to be palatable to children of any age.) Esther has several singing numbers that are quite nice (and even reminiscent of An American Tale). The moral of the story is no stronger than "You don't have to be afraid to do the right thing" and to trust in God. 4.5 stars.

Eyewitness Ocean (1997)

Dorling Kindersley's Eyewitness books are top-of-the-line compilations of interesting and well-written facts woven together with impressive photos and illustrations -- and so are its DVDs. Except Ocean. Medium-grade stock photography fills the first 6 minutes and most of the remaining 29 minutes. The CGI is substandard and the script has the aggravating habit of addressing a different topic in every sentence -- and failing to use plain English to boot. 3 stars.

The Lord of the Rings (1978)

Thirty years and two months ago on the release of his animated take on J.R.R. Tolkien's The Lord of the Rings, Ralph Bakshi (Wizards) strove for state-of-the-art honors through the dominant use of rotoscoping (filming live action to limn as cel animation). His efforts proved impressive at the time -- if uneven -- though ultimately his budget betrayed him. (Bakshi ran out of money after filming the equivalent of the first two books of the trilogy, leaving Rankin-Bass an opening to release a hurried animation of The Return of the King in 1980 that was not much better than the firm's mostly cringeworthy animation of The Hobbit in 1977. In the end, Bakshi's American Pop arrived the next year with much better production values.) Bakshi's love for Tolkien's material is evident in his tendency to be faithful to the books and much of his footage remains iconic for the Tolkien aficionado even after the arrival of Peter Jackson's quadruple-length trio of live-action-and-CGI feature films 25 years later. I was just finishing college and starting a lifelong literary devotion to Tolkien when this movie came out, and I saw it several times in the theater. It still holds up well for any Middle-Earth fan, however, you may skip it if you are interested only in "the latest and greatest" -- for example, if you prefer Peter Jackson's King Kong to any previous version. Granted, Bakshi's film has flaws. Tolkien devotees are piqued when the wizard Saruman is referred to more often than not as Aruman (a studio decision made in midstream to differentiate Saruman from Sauron that never got cleaned up) not to mention the mispronunciations of Celeborn, Minas Tirith, and more. Animation fans may wonder if Bakshi was accidentally trying to invent Squigglevision. Minor quibbles with characters exist but, being familiar with the work of perhaps every Tolkien illustrator, I embraced Bakshi's depictions of Frodo, Sam, Gandalf, Boromir, Legolas (voiced by Anthony Daniels) and others. The weathered Aragorn (voiced by John Hurt) was even acceptable (since he didn't say Kemo Sabe). Some scenes drag on in a psychedelic limbo, such as the ford of Bruinen, Lord knows why. Jackson's Lord of the Rings is the definitive edition but if you love Tolkien's corpus, see Bakshi's version -- if only to check it off the list. After all, 1978 is the year that gave us Corvette Summer, Attack of the Killer Tomatoes, and Heaven Can Wait -- so you know you're already ahead of the game, right? 4 stars.

The First Valentine (1989)

The First Valentine is an admittedly low-budget production best suited for preteen Sunday school classes (Catholic or Protestant) since anyone older might legitimately fail to take it seriously. For all of its informal trappings, however, its story is the noble and powerful one of the martyrdom of St. Valentine, a Roman nobleman, played ably (if somewhat channeling Lorne Green as Adama) by Jonathan Farwell. IW. 3 stars.

The Nativity Story (2006)

The Nativity Story pays serious attention to making an authentic representation of life in Judea two thousand years ago, even reciting the Jewish prayers in Hebrew (although the balance of the dialog is spoken in stiffly accented English). As such it feels like The Ten Commandments meets The Passion of the Christ -- though with fewer chariot races and less bloodletting if not diminished mortal angst. Our story begins with the Slaughter of the Innocents before reviewing the events of the year that led to Herod's genocidal edict. Keisha Castle-Hughes as Mary and Oscar Isaac as Joseph are thoroughly convincing and emotionally transparent as the betrothed couple that confronts a social taboo yet continues to embrace each other -- through the continually clarifying lens of faith in God. (Angelic messengers by day and by night also help on occasion.) While fundamentalists will spew their grape juice and protest that any detail or dialog not literally in the Bible is therefore unscriptural or blasphemous (which is why they are called Protestants), Catholics and those evangelicals who cling to their humanity as well as their dogma should find The Nativity Story to be an exceptionally authentic, spiritual, and scripturally resonant rendering of the real-life drama surrounding the birth of the baby Jesus. It's certainly an emotionally evocative and compelling movie that my family intends to own and to watch at least once a year. 4.5 stars.

Modern Marvels: The Manhattan Project (2002)

This History Channel overview of the Manhattan Project provides a time capsule of the conception, engineering challenges, and sociopolitical impact of the invention of the atomic bomb, which decisively ended the cataclysm that was World War II. It begins with the unsung hero, Leo Szilard, who with Enrico Fermi patented the process of nuclear fission before he (with the help of Albert Einstein) convinced FDR to authorize the development of a nuclear weapon before Germany and persuaded his colleagues to self-censor their research in case it should lend an advantage to the Nazis. In a balanced fashion, this program details the rapid construction of the massive industrial complex (which used 10% of the nation's electric capacity) centered on developing the bomb in secret in addition to the handful of men charged with introducing the world to the dawn of the nuclear age. The humanity and suffering of Japan's nuclear victims receives attention but not without noting the ferocity of Japan's aggression and tenacity in addition to the ultimate calculus of casualties and the penultimate perspective of history. IW. 4 stars.

VeggieTales Classics: Larry-Boy & The Fib from Outer Space (1997)

Larry-Boy is a VeggieTales spinoff (with the classic VeggieTales musical intro) that conveys more than the usual dose of the series' trademark absurdist humor. (Can anyone really explain why the Batman-ish hero Larry-Boy sports toilet plungers for his helmet ears and cruisemobile wheels?) Kids love this stuff though as an adult, I got a few good chuckles -- mainly parody-related since Larry-Boy's behind-the-scenes tactical support is his English butler, who comes up with all kinds of high-tech weaponry that he unfortunately hasn't found time to make or install or label correctly yet. (For example, as a tech guy myself, I found the computer's restart process to be a quick two-second stitch.) The story involves a palm-sized ball of a space alien that represents a "small fib" which grows to gargantuan size and can only be defeated by one person. (Hint: It's definitely not superputz Larry-Boy.) Appropriately didactic with a clear summary of the moral of the story in the lessons-learned section, this Larry-Boy episode is VeggieTales chic with even more humorously obnoxious musical numbers than usual. My youngest son and I watched this title on a videotape from the public library to save a rental slot. 3.5 stars.

Eyewitness Insect (1994)

Dorling Kindersley's Eyewitness books are top-of-the-line compilations of interesting and well-written facts woven together with impressive photos and illustrations. Like DK's books, Insect is an excellent DVD -- provided you like bugs -- and Martin Sheen is a superb narrator. As always, the DK material reads quite well and tells a fascinating and fact-filled story. I watched Insect on videotape (35 min) without the extra material since I generally don't watch the latter anyway. 4.5 stars.

Eyewitness Dinosaur (2008)

Dorling Kindersley's Eyewitness books are top-of-the-line compilations of interesting and well-written facts woven together with impressive photos and illustrations. The DVDs are quite well done too, esp. with Martin Sheen as narrator. I watched Dinosaur on videotape (35 min) without the extra material since neither this service nor its competitor stocks the disc yet. (It's not even to be found on imdb.com.) As always, the DK material reads quite well and tells a fascinating and fact-filled story. I would only quibble with a few pronunciation errors and the goofy green animated dinosaur in this production. 3.5 stars.

Little Shepherd (2002)

Little Shepherd is a simply animated, quasibiblical Lutheran production with the clear target demographic of evangelical children aged 1-6. Didactic at best, its sappy sentimentalism and pureed Judeo-Christianity will likely cause gastronomic reflux in any adult who isn't the parent of such a child or given to overt displays of pietism. Our story begins with the young shepherd-to-be gamboling with his blue-eyed lamb even as reports of wolves threaten the flocks. His wise grandfather counsels him in faith and courage while his just-the-facts father calls him to task and sneers at the Jewish hope in a Messiah. As his foil, a younger sister constantly picks on him and says she wants to be a shepherd -- but must learn to do woman's work instead. The voice talent is acceptable but the script is quite formulaic (to put it nicely). The Little Drummer Boy has more authentic emotion in its pinky finger than this entire show, which concludes soon after Mary says, "Baby Jesus needs a good shepherd to look after [his lamb]." IW. 2.5 stars.

The Lone Ranger and the Lost City of Gold (1958)

The Lone Ranger and the Lost City of Gold is the first classic western movie I've seen in many many moons. (It's been fewer but still many moons since I've seen a movie where the family is watching a cowboys-and-injuns circle-the-wagons shoot-em-up.) This second Lone Ranger movie -- and the last one starring Clayton Moore and Jay Silverheels together -- has it all: the "Hi-yo, Silver!" cry and theme (the William Tell overture), Silver's Lassie-like intelligence ("What's the matter, big fellow?"), a white woman playing a Native American woman, Tonto saying "Me get horse/doctor/father," a societal conflictedness about racial prejudice, a perfunctory script and yeomanlike acting -- but boy the horseriding! The storyline makes actual sense even if specific developments fail to do so. (It's not wise to announce onseself as the sole survivor after the preceding four have been assassinated.) Clayton Moore disguises himself to play a dual role as a southern gentleman who tangles with the femme fatale (Noreen Nash). 3 stars. (12-18-08)

Valkyrie (2009)

Because he's stayed off the crazy talk for some time now, I felt ready to reacquaint myself with Tom Cruise in a December 15 preview screening of Valkyrie (a movie that had a hard time being made in Germany because of Cruise's high-profile involvement in Scientology). Since Valkyrie is based on and hews closely to historical events in 1944 Germany under the dictatorship of Adolph Hitler, it is a very tense and suspenseful film from the opening credits to the end. (Seeing the movie on an empty stomach, I decided to be nice to my knotted bowels afterwards.) Historically, we know Hitler survived the highly placed and well-organized final attempt on his life nine months before the end of the war; no suspense exists in the outcome. What weaves the tendrils of tension throughout this film is seeing the extensive collusion and mortal risk required to machinate a clandestine assassination of the Fuehrer in broad daylight at the heart of his military empire. The viscerally foreboding soundtrack helps too. Cruise does well in the tightrope role as the most courageous and central figure in the conspiracy -- he's even quietly "ballsy" when necessary. Though we touchingly see his love of family, it is always subordinated to what he knows he must do. (Col. Claus von Stauffenberg's wife and children miraculously survived the war; his widow died in 2006 at age 92. For the full back story, search The Telegraph [telegraph.co.uk] for Stauffenberg or Valkyrie.) To his last breath, Cruise in this role voices the operatives' key motives for eliminating Hitler as "We have to show the world that not all Germany was like him" and "Long live our sacred Germany!" Depicting the heart of a totalitarian regime is tense enough but it's more menacing to witness (as it were) the inner hive of the world's most prolific mass murderer. David Bamber as Hitler is less chilling than I hoped, however, and we usually see only the back of his head -- a plot device that works well before we see his face and hear his voice but less so afterwards or often. The actual detonation and ensuing operations (pro- and counter-Valkyrie) were portrayed a bit less dramatically than I expected. Also, for some reason, Cruise resembles a doughy-faced Stephen Colbert. Nevertheless, make no mistake: Valkyrie gives us a taut and valuable window on the most authentically patriotic chapter in Germany's history. 4.5 stars.

Bill Burr: Why Do I Do This (2008)

Standup. Bill Burr is hilarious! It helps that he's a self-admitted psycho -- but one who knows how to draw the line between thinking of something psycho and not actually doing it -- then relating his thought processes to us with uproarious effect. (His description of the two steering-wheel inches that separate driving sanely from causing untold carnage may be the most memorable.) Burr is funnier than anyone I've heard since Carlin and holds total control of the stage. He's not politically correct but his motives are right on! (He riffs against animal population control then notes "It's not deer that are causing all that highway congestion.") This guy actually makes pedophilia, racism, and Hitler funny -- because he gets us laughing at them. (He neatly pegs the paranoia that pedophilia has branded on today's society and he rightly identifies fast food as a societal soporific. His proposal that everyone carry a chloroform rag in their shirt pocket, ready to take any wacko down before tattooing their forehead with "Could be the next Hitler," should be considered by Congress in special session.) Burr looks and sounds a bit like Jim Gaffigan in Beyond the Pale -- esp. when he channels that small voice inside the bystander or audience member -- but he's very high-energy throughout his performance. (Again, it helps that he's psycho.) Be aware that he's as facile as most standup comics at peppering his banter with "JC" and the two primary four-letter words. But don't miss this guy -- his social commentary is crazy like a fox. IW. 4.5 stars.

Batman vs. Dracula (2005)

Batman geeks can quibble the fine points but dramatically speaking, to those who are merely familiar with the Batman legend in all of its forms (from Adam West to Batman and Beyond), Batman vs. Dracula is passable entertainment. Passable animation, passable script, with a paddable if strong central plot: Dracula inexplicably arrives in Gotham City and begins an arithmetically progressive dinner on its citizens, converting greater numbers to undead vampires. I can't see how any parent would let their 4- to 8-year-olds watch this show because it presents Batman with an adversary who is "evil incarnate" and greatly stronger and faster. (Spoiler: He's unbeatable without Batman's lux ex machina -- but don't worry about this clue if you know Latin, because the script clearly shows you Batman's two secret weapons early in the story and repeatedly comes back to them in case you don't get the hint -- for example, if you need the brilliant Bruce Wayne to write down ALUCARD and read it in a mirror to figure out the identity of his mysterious guest.) My 11-year-old son didn't have a problem with the show's gore -- but there is a lot of blood splattered about and gulped down by the crazed Joker. (He's vamping in more ways than one.) Some may call the script weak but remember, this is comic-book fare not Shakespeare here; some may slight the animation as weak, and I can only agree. 3 stars.

The Pitch (2006)

30-Second Bunnies Theatre and The 'Wood are sophomoric attempts next to the graduate-level dead-on humor of The Pitch. This comedy series pegs the smug banter of a Hollywood movie producer with his wannabe sycophants (scriptwriters, students, and actors) in 13 one- or two-minute Flash animation episodes: Snakes on a Plane (yet another Samuel Jackson movie pitch turns into Snakes on a Microbus), Film Students (who knew the red button was to call for Security?), Ninja (a real-life ninja demonstrates aggressive negotiations), Penguins (try to imagine Death March of the Penguins), Shatner (the morality crowd funds William Shatner in. a. Trekkian. reading. of. the. Bible. Spock!), Back in Black (Paul McCartney, "the sole surviving Beatle," and some other guy discuss movie concepts), Pirates (porn plus pirates equals a movie contract), Eastwood (Clint is forced to westernize his boxing script), Playa De Los Muertos (who wants beach-bimbo zombies?), Click (Adam Sandler is schmoozed over Jewish takes on Click), Hannibal Breached (Hannibal Lecter is born hungry), Brown Curry (Spike Lee tours Bollywood), and Guinness on Ice (Alec Guinness fulfills a contractual acting obligation posthumously). My favorites feature Shatner, Paul and Ringo, Sandler, and Eastwood. TV-MA for adult themes. IW. 4 stars.

Pokemon: The Rise of Darkrai (Pokemon Movie 10) (2007)

Wow -- finally a Pokemon movie I can stomach! I actually like it. The animation is excellent (in the background and foreground, that is, celestial and terrestrial) and there is even a storyline (not that it explains anything but there it is). There is more of a community of Pokemon creatures -- they are even introduced in a more holistic fashion as a vibrant ecology -- acting to help each other and altruistically standing in the gap to face a truly cosmic threat of destruction. The voice talent is off and Team Rocket only has a few throwaway scenes but you'll keep coming back for the attractive and detailed animation. 3 stars.

The 'Wood (2006)

The 'Wood is a Flash animation (Web cartoon) that's relaxed in artistic style and in humor content. (There's not much of either one.) The show's intro is irritatingly abrasive, incoherent, and sophomoric (repeating "The 'Wood" six times in different faux voices as if for emphasis). The series has six 1-minute episodes, one 3-minute episode, and three 2-minute episodes mildly spoofing Hollywood through the eyes of six actor-celebrities that happen to be bears. That's not much time to play with -- each 2-minute episode has about seven spoken sentences. In fact, the Starz intro with the loud, obnoxious show intro together occupy 40% of a 1-minute episode's time. The concept is cute but I barely broke into a couple of chuckles. IW. 2.5 stars.

30-Second Bunnies Theatre: Season 3 (2007)

30-Second Bunnies Theatre rockets into Season 3 with its bunnymorphic Flash animation and fast-paced patter of bon mots, one-liners, and key quotes culled from the following 30 popular movies: A Christmas Story, Casablanca, Brokeback Mountain, Caddyshack, Superman, Office Space, Raiders Of The Lost Ark, The Ring, Fight Club, [National Lampoon's] Christmas Vacation, Borat, Bond [a 007 medley], Spider-Man 1 & 2, Pirates of the Caribbean 1 & 2, March of the Penguins, Die Hard, Napoleon Dynamite, Saw, The Grudge, Kill Bill [1&2], Snakes on a Plane, Spider-Man 3, Pirates of the Caribbean 3, Grindhouse, Jurassic Park, Sixteen Candles, Superbad, Goodfellas, 30 Days of Night, and No Country for Old Men. While all the episodes are canny with their comedy, you'll probably enjoy most the ones for movies you've already seen. The James Bond medley is most ingenious though. Preparing to name a selection of my favorites underscored for me the fairly even quality of the bunnytoons as well as their brevity: I couldn't pick less than a dozen -- or, if I had to (but it would be hard), just one. Rated TV-14 for adult content (bunnies swear, shoot each other, and get naked or hump). Go bunnies! IW. 4 stars.

30-Second Bunnies Theatre: Season 2 (2005)

30-Second Bunnies Theatre is Web-comic-age-inspired semigenius and a hoot and a half (two hoots if you've already seen the movie being parodied). Season 1 featured only three episodes but Season 2 has 15: Rocky Horror Picture Show, Pulp Fiction, Highlander, The Big Chill, Night of the Living Dead, Titanic, The Shining, It's a Wonderful Life, The Exorcist, Alien, Jaws, War of the Worlds, Star Wars: The New Hope, King Kong, and Rocky. These Flash animations are fast-paced so one viewing may not be enough for you -- and your friends will want to see them too. (Four hoots and counting!) My favorites are Night of the Living Dead, Titanic ("I won't let go!" *Splash!*), It's A Wonderful Life, Alien, Jaws, and Star Wars -- pretty much every movie that I've seen. Seriously, 30-Second Bunnies deliver lickety-split laughter with nary a feghoot. IW. 4 stars.

30-Second Bunnies Theatre: Season 1 (2004)

Instant Watch is the perfect way to access these three 30-second Flash animation summaries of Freddy vs. Jason, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and Scream -- starring bunnies. Anthropomorphic bunnies, but yep, bunnies (and with squeaky voices). I love parodies and these fast-paced popcorn-sized morsels of animation goodness just beg for repeated viewings and laughter. Show these to your friends, they'll have a hoot too! IW. 4 stars.

Crimson Tide (1995)

Gene Hackman and Denzel Washington crackle onscreen in Crimson Tide as the wiry pitbull of a veteran captain and the cool scholar of a rookie executive officer, together commanding a U.S. nuclear submarine sent to the brink as (for all they know) the last and sole defense against Russian missiles in a global cold war flareup. The navy command protocols are crisp and lend an initial air of authenticity, however, the plot gradually devolves into a miasma of quibblesome questions. (Can everyone really smoke so much on a submerged nuclear sub? How can a kitchen fire get so out of control? Is the captain's dog allowed to pee in the corridor?) Of course the big gorilla question is: How can a nuclear sub have only one radio to receive and confirm its nuclear-launch commands? (Only slightly less urgent: Could Denzel inspire the comm officer to fix the radio faster -- though, of course, just in the nick of time -- without making Star Trek analogies?) Granted, the plot requires severed communications if you want two commanding officers to feud, wrangle, mutiny, and countermutiny (not to mention engage in subterfuge and fisticuffs) over a conflicting interpretion of their orders esp. when a use-them-or-lose-them first-strike missile launch would tip the scales into nuclear Armageddon. So just close your eyes to that first "if" and enjoy the onscreen fireworks of the ensuing "then." Crimson Tide is really about doing one's duty and following orders -- unflinchingly if not always unthinkingly. Don't miss the low-key performances of Viggo Mortenson as Denzel's fairweather friend and weapons officer plus James Gandolfini and Rick Schroder as two lieutenants. And, lest we forget Denzel's homefront motivation to do his duty so well, his kids are cute as buttons. 4 stars. (12-12-08)

Dr. Seuss' The Cat in the Hat (2003)

It's hard to stomach the rank bile of those who hate this movie so much. Perhaps the bashers believe The Cat in the Hat movie should have been rated G to remain as innocent as The Cat in the Hat book, which was written for 2- to 6-year-olds. (Well, a book is not a live-action movie -- and for a movie to do well, it needs a broader target demographic than just kiddos.) So this movie was rated PG and specifically intended for children age 7 and up. (Ignorance is no defense since anyone can read these facts two inches to the left of these words.) And it is about as mild a PG rating as possible. (Does anyone really believe that a butt-crack visual, a fart joke, and a one-second cue of a stiffening hat and tail are too harsh for a PG rating?) The self-righteous shock of these haters might be more persuasive if they refrained from tagging the movie with harsh and tasteless words. (Does being offended by a fart joke ever justify the words "This movie s-cks b-lls"?) Besides, isn't squirreling mild bits of grownup humor into children's movies a commonly accepted way of tossing a bone to the parents who have to stay awake during the entire production anyway? So let's look at the real rather than the imagined weaknesses and strengths of this movie. First of all, the art direction is whimsical and inspired -- perhaps by Edward Scissorhands as much as Seuss. The storyline is quirky and fun -- however, fully the first 20 minutes are a preamble about the mother's real estate career and her sleezy neighbor's designs on her hand (and money) in marriage. The two children perform admirably in their updated Seussian roles -- Dakota Fanning more so than Spencer Breslin. Mike Myers as the Cat in the Hat is deep-dimples cute -- until he starts spouting the same schtick as all of his previous characters (and yes, sometimes in the same sentence). Thing 1 and Thing 2, unfortunately, are so over the top that, as chaos breaks loose, the nagging thoughts at the back of your head begin to make you wonder, "What were they thinking?" Oddly, the CGI fish is the most lovable character in the movie! 3.5 stars. (12-11-08)

Bolt (2008)

Bolt is a blast of pure fun from Disney with a well-drawn story that plays like it's from Pixar. Bolt is The Incredibles meets The Truman Show before it becomes Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey. It's about believing in yourself and facing down disillusionment -- choosing to stand in the gap as if saving the day depends on you (even though others help close the gap because you're not alone except for that crucial decisive moment). The animation is excellent and the story is paced at a good clip with lots of chuckle- and bellylaugh-inducing humor. I love the premise of Bolt and this movie caught the attention of everyone in the theatre from the opening scene, which gave us Bolt as a cute puppy meeting his new owner. (You could hear the coos throughout the audience, esp. from my 11-year-old viewing partner.) John Travolta and all the voice talent did excellent work and I was impressed with Miley Cyrus' vocals in the soundtrack. I'd love to see Bolt again and so, I suspect, would any child. 5 stars. (12-11-08)

Rudolph and Frosty's Christmas in July (1979)

The appeal of Rudolph and Frosty's Christmas in July is pure nostalgia for Rankin-Bass stopmotion Christmas specials more than the script and the soundtrack, which are passable though not as catchy or memorable as previous shows. What's amazing is the length and breadth of the script and production: 97 minutes of characters, exposition, and musical interludes including a circus and two parades. For main characters, you get Rudolph (voiced by Billie Mae Richards) and Frosty (Jackie Vernon) with his wife Crystal (Shelley Winters) and two children plus Santa (Mickey Rooney) and Mrs. Claus (Darlene Conley) -- with sentimental songs and narrative going back to their weddings -- not to mention the evil wizard Winterbolt (delightfully voiced by the versatile Paul Frees -- think Boris Badenov meets Saruman). You also have Lilly Loraine (Ethel Merman), the six-gun-shootin' owner of the Circus by the Sea, with her beautiful acrobatic daughter Laine (Shelby Flint) and her love interest Milton (Red Buttons) the ice cream man. To wind up the plot, let's not forget Scratcher the jealous reindeer (Alan Sues), Big Ben the whale (Hal Peary), and Jack Frost (Paul Frees). The story goes on and on -- though in a good way unless you happen to be feeling grinchy or just grownup. As a result, tykes should love the circus and its animals best after Rudolph and Frosty and Santa, however, the middle of the show may be too dark and sinister for them. (Winterbolt's arsenal includes an ice scepter that shoots beams, an icy-faced talking wall, an all-seeing ice globe, snowdust that puts bad ideas in good characters' heads at a great distance, dark fog and cyclones, and a snake-drawn sleigh -- all in service of his nefarious scheme to overcome Rudolph, Frosty and family, Santa and ultimately all the children of the world.) On the other hand, we get to see the origin of Rudolph's glowing nose as a salvific gift from the celestial Mother Borealis and the courage she inspires in him. Speaking just for its length and inventiveness, Rudolph and Frosty is a Christmas classic though a lesser light in the firmament. See it at least once but make sure you have enough milk and cookies to last 97 minutes. 4 stars. (12-11-08)